"only time separates us from the grave"
i wrote that back in 1981
sitting in a cafe in anglesea victoria
my whole life stretching out ahead of me
now today i've moved up closer
closer to my turn
the great mystery indeed
houdini promised his wife he would come back to her
show her a secret sign
he never did though
couldnt
wouldnt
shouldnt
or what?
did houdini realise once he was on the otherside
that it is as pointless to make contact
as it is for a university student to visit his old high school
or is it simply that
there is nothing out there
that death is a cessation
the end of everything
not even blackness
like before we are born
its like non existence
its not so bad
actually
i was blissfully unaware all through the witchtrials n WW1
the bubonic plague?
the eruption of vesuvius?
the destruction of the alexandrian library?
nope
i wasnt there
and its nice to suddenly pop up in 1954
all the hard works been done
hey folks it was civilization
all the nasty contagious diseases gone
all the big wars done for a while at least
sk turns up
hangs around for a while
i cant remember anyone explaining death to me
it was just there like winter and tooth decay
if i'd had past lives
i couldnt remember them
but that means almost nothing:
last night as i lay abed dreaming
i couldnt remember my "real" life at all
this one ive led nearly 54 years
and one little dream blotted it out
one little dream concealed my life from my mind
the dream told me i was doing this n that
i couldnt remember steve kilbey
the dream fed me my reality and i swallowed it whole
until i awoke
now the dream is almost concealed from me
in a few hours it will be nothing
never to be recalled again
imagine then the long sleep of death
its power to hide your memories
energy that is you
the essential "i"
i am i am i am
the spirit energy that cannot be burned or crushed or extinguished
in the bhagavad gita (the blessed lords song)
arjuna cannot fight in a war that must be fought
he breaks down and admits to krishna his friend
that he has no stomach for this fight
loathe to kill warriors on the other side who are from his own clan
krishna admonishes his friend and disciple
saying
never was there a time all these kings and soldiers did not exist
never will there be a time when they cease to exist...
he tells arjuna the soul cannot perish
that it merely takes on new clothes and another face
this is what the hindus and also the buddhists believe
it is at the core of their faiths
this tiny chunk of spirit
broken off from the main spirit
(of course i'm talking in broad laymans terms here)
sits in the pineal gland ...the third eye...the seat of the soul
interfacing with the body and mind
directing them as a driver directs a car
playing out another part in a huge cosmic play
of course after accepting that
the hindus and the buddhists split
the hindus say the soul becomes refined
eventually ready to go back to god
a personalised god
a huge formless god
paradises
planets of dakinis at your bidding
as a mote of light in gods glorious effulgence
the buddha says
the soul should be extinguished
free from desires causing us to reincarnate
in this vale of tears behind a veil of tears
buddha saw reincarnation as a bus to jump off of
he wanted to break the wheel of eternal return
then the soul could enter nirvana
a permanent cessation
an extinguishment
not being and not not being
isnt it funny
that as a "western christian-like" creature
i fear the void of nothingness like nothing else
yet as a would-be buddhist
i revere this nothingness as a great peaceful sea
a sea i will slip into like a drop slipping into the silver sea
regarding my lives on earth as a tortuous ordeal
i will aspire to this non-being with all my being...
death researchers report tunnels and the whitelight
christ-esque figures greet near dead travellers
husbands n wives n fathers n mothers waiting for them too
feeling of bliss and peace
scientists gleefully dismiss these experiences
as the hallucinations of a dying brain
(all that dmt from the pineal)
heart attack survivors report in minute detail
scenes as they hover over their lifeless bodies
while ambulance men frantically try to revive
some report a choice (should i stay or should i go)
i saw a show on an old man who died in hospital
yeah his quack said
this dude was deader than a doornail for a while
the old guy says
he was released of pain
of restriction
of worry
he rushed down the astral path
the white light blazing ahead
he meets this lovely lovely cosmic geezer
it could have been jesus or someone like him...
this geezer says
go back old timer
go back for a little while longer
no says old bloke
i like this much better out here
go back old codger says jesus
i promised your wife she could have a little more time
you did? says the old guy
its up to you says jesus
the old guy reluctantly lets himself be revived
back to the pain
back to the hospital
he tells the story to his loving wife
thats right she says
i did do a deal with the man
he said i could have you for just another year
and they both were happy
i guess you could conclude a few things here
1 the old guy was hallucinating
2 the old guy was an actor in a tv hoax in attempt to garner ratings
3 the old guy was telling the truth as he saw it
anyway
after all that
i reach no conclusions
i believe in an afterlife
i believe in reincarnation
i sometimes doubt it all too
sometimes im just not believing anything
otherdays i believe everything im told
death..is it really such a bitch?
as bad as life?
what the hell is going on?
wouldnt you like to know?
Wednesday, April 30, 2008
Tuesday, April 29, 2008
vale matty c
matt moved out of this universe yesterday at 5 a.m.
his sister held his hand singing him onwards
he was surrounded by his loving family
matt was just 40 years old
you know sometimes
when people die
somebody writes a load of stuff
about what a decent upright lovely person they were
and you think
sure sure.....
well this aint like that!
ive already told you about him
this matt
how he faced the last days of his life so bravely
a couple of months actually
he just lay there only capable of squeezing yer hand at the end
this active dashing wiry geezer
stretched out on a hospital bed
as his family and friends and his partner n her kids
came and visited and smiled and wept
matt was the best friend of my youngest brother john
hes been around since i cant remember
i cant remember even the first time i met him
he was cheeky optimistic and always moving about
i never saw him lying on a couch smoking dope
or sitting around complaining or philosophizing
he was an in the thick of it kind of guy
he did lights for johns band
and when that stopped
he moved on n up into lighting films
and worked on the matrixs and even this new one "australia"
(with our nic n our huge)
i remember sitting in the sauna
while matt told me how he'd been instructed to set up
a big lighting whatsit on the lawn of a heritage building here in syd
it was raining
i wouldnt do that.. matty was warning em
no no no just do it "they" said
so he did
struggled with this thing he didnt wanna do for ages
it kept raining
the stars came out n didnt like the rainy conditions
and went back to their trailers
and the lighting whatsit had sunk into the sodden grass
and "they" were yelling at matty
for ruining the lawn of one of sydneys old stately homes
what happened then ?i asked
and then matty broke into one of his wide hooligan grins
fuck em! he said...i thought i'm getting out of this business
what about nicole n huge ? i asked
yeah...matty laughed...what about em?
he was a kind of ultra realistic fellow
he never said more than he had to
what he said was concise and to the point
he looked like bobby dylan with his hooked nose and curly hair
he had that kind of no bullshit feel dylan has too
a masculine man a mans man a real man
matty would have been a faithful friend
or a formidable enemy
he had not an ounce of fat
and he seemed fighting fit
he seemed like he never changed from 17 to 40...
when he first started having seizures about 6 years ago
he was diagnosed with a tumour
and had surgery and chemo n radio
he never complained or even hinted at feeling sorry for himself
he told ya what was happening with his treatment
in a matter of fact way
he didnt allow you to dwell on the "oh you poor man!" bits
he fucking smiled when i asked him how he could stand all that vomiting
ah ya get used to it he chuckled
matty lost his hair and had a vivid red scar on his head
when my daughter elli had her op
matty sent her a card
"from one cracked nut to another"
i saw matty at the pool and his scalp looked so sore and livid
do you think your hair'll ever come back ? i asked
matt shrugged
although a bloody handsome guy he didnt give a fuck if it did or not
but it did
i saw him down the pool a few weeks later
blond curly hair coming back through his blasted skull
wow! its coming back and its really thick! i gushed
matty just winked
sometime later i saw him
he had just been given a clean bill of health
no sign of the tumour
he was justifiably elated
he had also been warned that probably
eventually
the stupid accursed tumour would return
and it would kill him
matty lived life with this in mind
he tempered his life in the slightly faster lane
with yoga and always lotsa exercise
he reconnected with an old flame
and was in the process of moving into their new house
when the tumour came back after a couple of years
matty did a year of chemo
more radio
i saw him one last time at the pool
he was in the dressing room
steroids for the treatments made him look puffy
(matt never looked puffy)
his voice had a tremble
and my ringing ears could hardly hear him
good day big fella.... he said
how did ya go? i asked
i could only manage 12 laps he said
he looked a bit demoralised
im going back in he said
that was the last time i saw him outside
outside here
where we walk around and buy food and exercise
and pay bills and make love
outside here
as opposed to jail and hospitals
matty had the op
the tumour turned aggressive
it merely rushed back into the space it had occupied
with a deadly vengeance
matty never went home
he stayed in hospital and waited to die
he took it on the chin
he defied misery
he was a mans man to the end
and now hes on the other side
whatever the fuck it is
i know hes making a good job of it
angels devils or a formless void
matt will handle it with aplomb
i asked him to be there when i go into deaths realm
if its possible i said
he was only handsqueezing at this stage
but he looked in my eyes
squeezed my hand almost imperceptibly
and i knew he would be there
if it was possible....
when my brother told me matt had died yesterday
i was glad that hed finally gotten away
he'd done his gig here on earth
and now he was in a fix you wouldnt wish on yer worst enemy
he was loved in spades
women adored him
men admired him
kids looked up to him
the kinda guy i wish all five of my daughters could marry
a true diamond geezer
a real aussie larrikin spirit
a courageous and humble man
a true friend and boon companion
i cant believe it
goodbye matt
we loved ya so much!
sk april 29, 2008
his sister held his hand singing him onwards
he was surrounded by his loving family
matt was just 40 years old
you know sometimes
when people die
somebody writes a load of stuff
about what a decent upright lovely person they were
and you think
sure sure.....
well this aint like that!
ive already told you about him
this matt
how he faced the last days of his life so bravely
a couple of months actually
he just lay there only capable of squeezing yer hand at the end
this active dashing wiry geezer
stretched out on a hospital bed
as his family and friends and his partner n her kids
came and visited and smiled and wept
matt was the best friend of my youngest brother john
hes been around since i cant remember
i cant remember even the first time i met him
he was cheeky optimistic and always moving about
i never saw him lying on a couch smoking dope
or sitting around complaining or philosophizing
he was an in the thick of it kind of guy
he did lights for johns band
and when that stopped
he moved on n up into lighting films
and worked on the matrixs and even this new one "australia"
(with our nic n our huge)
i remember sitting in the sauna
while matt told me how he'd been instructed to set up
a big lighting whatsit on the lawn of a heritage building here in syd
it was raining
i wouldnt do that.. matty was warning em
no no no just do it "they" said
so he did
struggled with this thing he didnt wanna do for ages
it kept raining
the stars came out n didnt like the rainy conditions
and went back to their trailers
and the lighting whatsit had sunk into the sodden grass
and "they" were yelling at matty
for ruining the lawn of one of sydneys old stately homes
what happened then ?i asked
and then matty broke into one of his wide hooligan grins
fuck em! he said...i thought i'm getting out of this business
what about nicole n huge ? i asked
yeah...matty laughed...what about em?
he was a kind of ultra realistic fellow
he never said more than he had to
what he said was concise and to the point
he looked like bobby dylan with his hooked nose and curly hair
he had that kind of no bullshit feel dylan has too
a masculine man a mans man a real man
matty would have been a faithful friend
or a formidable enemy
he had not an ounce of fat
and he seemed fighting fit
he seemed like he never changed from 17 to 40...
when he first started having seizures about 6 years ago
he was diagnosed with a tumour
and had surgery and chemo n radio
he never complained or even hinted at feeling sorry for himself
he told ya what was happening with his treatment
in a matter of fact way
he didnt allow you to dwell on the "oh you poor man!" bits
he fucking smiled when i asked him how he could stand all that vomiting
ah ya get used to it he chuckled
matty lost his hair and had a vivid red scar on his head
when my daughter elli had her op
matty sent her a card
"from one cracked nut to another"
i saw matty at the pool and his scalp looked so sore and livid
do you think your hair'll ever come back ? i asked
matt shrugged
although a bloody handsome guy he didnt give a fuck if it did or not
but it did
i saw him down the pool a few weeks later
blond curly hair coming back through his blasted skull
wow! its coming back and its really thick! i gushed
matty just winked
sometime later i saw him
he had just been given a clean bill of health
no sign of the tumour
he was justifiably elated
he had also been warned that probably
eventually
the stupid accursed tumour would return
and it would kill him
matty lived life with this in mind
he tempered his life in the slightly faster lane
with yoga and always lotsa exercise
he reconnected with an old flame
and was in the process of moving into their new house
when the tumour came back after a couple of years
matty did a year of chemo
more radio
i saw him one last time at the pool
he was in the dressing room
steroids for the treatments made him look puffy
(matt never looked puffy)
his voice had a tremble
and my ringing ears could hardly hear him
good day big fella.... he said
how did ya go? i asked
i could only manage 12 laps he said
he looked a bit demoralised
im going back in he said
that was the last time i saw him outside
outside here
where we walk around and buy food and exercise
and pay bills and make love
outside here
as opposed to jail and hospitals
matty had the op
the tumour turned aggressive
it merely rushed back into the space it had occupied
with a deadly vengeance
matty never went home
he stayed in hospital and waited to die
he took it on the chin
he defied misery
he was a mans man to the end
and now hes on the other side
whatever the fuck it is
i know hes making a good job of it
angels devils or a formless void
matt will handle it with aplomb
i asked him to be there when i go into deaths realm
if its possible i said
he was only handsqueezing at this stage
but he looked in my eyes
squeezed my hand almost imperceptibly
and i knew he would be there
if it was possible....
when my brother told me matt had died yesterday
i was glad that hed finally gotten away
he'd done his gig here on earth
and now he was in a fix you wouldnt wish on yer worst enemy
he was loved in spades
women adored him
men admired him
kids looked up to him
the kinda guy i wish all five of my daughters could marry
a true diamond geezer
a real aussie larrikin spirit
a courageous and humble man
a true friend and boon companion
i cant believe it
goodbye matt
we loved ya so much!
sk april 29, 2008
Monday, April 28, 2008
ultra tendre
pinpoint lets in light
who knows?
the inevitable out there waiting
out there somewhere
just like everything
in its place
sequentially discrete
at its proper distance
space between 2 notes
last day of holy days
last chance to repent
i read the skies by movement of the ground
alive in the chrono-rapids
conveyed down times streams
a fork a decision a change
lives end
lives begin
lives spiral away
andromeda rolls over on her stomach
while the red dwarves glimmer on the sidelines
let me watch growls a star as it burns itself away
let me sea says the ocean
let me in cries the outside
let me out screams the interior
complex forces interact
suns meander through human eyes
swirling crimson clouds squeeze out raindrops
grief comes in bursts
the throat aches so terribly
fingers numbly drop
the mirror has aged a hundred years since i last looked
i hide and i hide
no compartments left
i try to build up some layer of protection
the atmosphere flames me up
i re enter too fast
i cannot slow down nor alleviate my terrible momentum
i see the roof of the house
i see birds scatter at the corners of my eyes
i see rust as it eats the cars
i see the traffic snarled in its ambition
i see women putting on their faces
i see women fighting time
i see men weakened by nerves
i see childrens cruel games
i see tunnels in the air through which evil manifests
i see the evolution of morning swelling into night
trespassers whisper as they are detected
lifes got more shocks up its many sleeves
time of matter
matter of time
time n matter n you
half in half out
trying to have your year and live it too
months go sssssss as they zip passed
months unravel around the 13th day
sound blurs
colours decay away
music thrums like a throbbing vein
chattering madness...dont you ever shut up?
baby universe scribbles on the galaxies walls
old planets revolve but have forgotten why
bitter medicines bloom in the starfields
god incarnates in time
god come back here
god we are so fragile
god we are so alone
god i need you now and later
god lemme live for ever
god lemme get everything done
i need rest
i need the rest of my rest
forget all the rest
let me off
let me be
take this cup from my hands
set me down safely
watch over us all
bring calm again
let the panic subside
let sleep do its work
let anaesthesia begin
let forgetfulness in
and
let me breathe
one more breath
one more thought
one more day
one more time
time starting now
now and always
or
just
gone
who knows?
the inevitable out there waiting
out there somewhere
just like everything
in its place
sequentially discrete
at its proper distance
space between 2 notes
last day of holy days
last chance to repent
i read the skies by movement of the ground
alive in the chrono-rapids
conveyed down times streams
a fork a decision a change
lives end
lives begin
lives spiral away
andromeda rolls over on her stomach
while the red dwarves glimmer on the sidelines
let me watch growls a star as it burns itself away
let me sea says the ocean
let me in cries the outside
let me out screams the interior
complex forces interact
suns meander through human eyes
swirling crimson clouds squeeze out raindrops
grief comes in bursts
the throat aches so terribly
fingers numbly drop
the mirror has aged a hundred years since i last looked
i hide and i hide
no compartments left
i try to build up some layer of protection
the atmosphere flames me up
i re enter too fast
i cannot slow down nor alleviate my terrible momentum
i see the roof of the house
i see birds scatter at the corners of my eyes
i see rust as it eats the cars
i see the traffic snarled in its ambition
i see women putting on their faces
i see women fighting time
i see men weakened by nerves
i see childrens cruel games
i see tunnels in the air through which evil manifests
i see the evolution of morning swelling into night
trespassers whisper as they are detected
lifes got more shocks up its many sleeves
time of matter
matter of time
time n matter n you
half in half out
trying to have your year and live it too
months go sssssss as they zip passed
months unravel around the 13th day
sound blurs
colours decay away
music thrums like a throbbing vein
chattering madness...dont you ever shut up?
baby universe scribbles on the galaxies walls
old planets revolve but have forgotten why
bitter medicines bloom in the starfields
god incarnates in time
god come back here
god we are so fragile
god we are so alone
god i need you now and later
god lemme live for ever
god lemme get everything done
i need rest
i need the rest of my rest
forget all the rest
let me off
let me be
take this cup from my hands
set me down safely
watch over us all
bring calm again
let the panic subside
let sleep do its work
let anaesthesia begin
let forgetfulness in
and
let me breathe
one more breath
one more thought
one more day
one more time
time starting now
now and always
or
just
gone
Sunday, April 27, 2008
what the time being puts together let no man tear asunder
evie n i go to the icebergs
i run into a guy i owe 300 dollars and its embarassing
i shoulda fixed him up before its just laziness
i know i know he says as i fumble my apology
anytime anytime he says
then im sitting in the sauna when harry comes in
hi harry i mutter
oh i didnt recognize you sitting there booms harry
youre normally making a lot more noise for yourself...
yeah... thanks harry...
i do only 12 laps and run outta steam
evies in the pool and she waits as i get up her end
and she swims underneath me as i go over her
making me me fearful for a kick in the privates
oof! yep...there it is!
we get home and i make pears
then we decide its such a warm perfect day
we'll go to the most lovely almost secret park in bondi
and we'll play kubb
a swedish game of throwing batons at wooden pieces...
did i ever tell ya that one day every now n then
these black ants have their own wedding/orgy/mass suicide
well yes
you see
if you think your sexlife is underpar
then grok this
there is only one chick in the whole colony
uh huh the queen herself
so if youre a horny ant then shes the only lady in town
gee how does that work timebeing i hear you ask
its not as bad as you think
cos most of the cats in the colony are neuter
thats correct...neither here nor there
they dont have sex
theyre the workers n the soldiers
there are however some males
ooh look they have wings too
on this one special day
the queen who can fly too
she flings herself naked through the sky
her majesty looking to get laid
the males
those prince consorts
hundreds of em
imagine the conversation between 2 male ants:
hey bill ...exciting isnt?
what reg...flying with the queen n stuff?
yeah bill..of course
you know shes only gonna mate with one of us reg?
yeah...i s'pose so...
well look around mate these bleeding thousands of us
yeah youre right bill...nevermind...what you doing after?
after? after reg? there is no fucking after...!
what you mean bill...no after..ha ha (laughs nervously)
reg dont you know....we're all gonna die today..matey or no matey..
glum silence
*
yes the males all perish
none return to the nest
not even he who got lucky with her maj
anyway all the ants have come out from underground
and theyre a little excited to say the least
its like airforce day and empire day and a sexy tragedy
all in one hit
scarlet kilbey is standing among them
in one black uprush they ascend up her legs
in her sox
in her undies
nipping her white baby groin
biting her pink soft chubby legs
scarlet kilbey goes ballistic
screaming and dancing a weird ants in my pants dance
the game is over before its begun
we think we got em all off
and she starts wailing again
and we find another little bugger biting her for all its worth
the doodles play kubb while we see to scarlet
eves much better than aurora
so shes all mouthy and showing off
while aurora keeps flouncing off in a huff
everybodies going for it
so much for a quiet game
eventually me n nk get to play
(i won resoundingly)
and i became just like eve... all cocky
sigh
sigh
i drive up to blue mountains at 4
in my old falcon, tibor
we drive up into the mountains alone
much roadwork
much police
much argy bargy
i suddenly realise i need a ye olde wee wee
and i drive off main drag into the forest and get lost somehow
i have to retrace my steps out after much panic
i get to katoomba
which i dont particularly care for that much
find the carrington
a huge old hotel where queen vickie once had a bath
(or something)
the people having the wedding are very nice
piercings and tattoos abound
they are all mid thirties
the p.a. isnt very good
there is no stage
i just stand there near a table singing
i start with providence
its all crackling distorted n feeble
this eventually is rectified
while i play n sing
people talk n laugh
kids run around
dinner gets served
(yuck! its bloody steak or something!)
however
the bride n groom and a few of the guests
really love my music so i close my eyes n think of england
i do "let it be me" and a bunch of oldies cheer
i quite enjoy myself even under these far from perfect conditions
daniel is a great groom and longtime fan
he and quite a few others tell me
they grew up listening to me
its nice
im a little shy i guess but these folks are real nice
i am saddened to learn daniels mother died 2 weeks before wedding
they serve me a vegan meal
we do thought that i was over you with daniel singing in mike w/ me
i do milky way for bridal waltz
a good time was had by all
i finish up
i get paid
long boring drive home
listening to some church jams n marvelling
25 minute pieces of music
like entire sides of prog rock albums never released
i almost drift off to sleep a few times
but luckily was jolted back to awareness by some force
come home just after midnite
my wife in the darkness waiting patiently for me
mmmm
goodnight to all
i run into a guy i owe 300 dollars and its embarassing
i shoulda fixed him up before its just laziness
i know i know he says as i fumble my apology
anytime anytime he says
then im sitting in the sauna when harry comes in
hi harry i mutter
oh i didnt recognize you sitting there booms harry
youre normally making a lot more noise for yourself...
yeah... thanks harry...
i do only 12 laps and run outta steam
evies in the pool and she waits as i get up her end
and she swims underneath me as i go over her
making me me fearful for a kick in the privates
oof! yep...there it is!
we get home and i make pears
then we decide its such a warm perfect day
we'll go to the most lovely almost secret park in bondi
and we'll play kubb
a swedish game of throwing batons at wooden pieces...
did i ever tell ya that one day every now n then
these black ants have their own wedding/orgy/mass suicide
well yes
you see
if you think your sexlife is underpar
then grok this
there is only one chick in the whole colony
uh huh the queen herself
so if youre a horny ant then shes the only lady in town
gee how does that work timebeing i hear you ask
its not as bad as you think
cos most of the cats in the colony are neuter
thats correct...neither here nor there
they dont have sex
theyre the workers n the soldiers
there are however some males
ooh look they have wings too
on this one special day
the queen who can fly too
she flings herself naked through the sky
her majesty looking to get laid
the males
those prince consorts
hundreds of em
imagine the conversation between 2 male ants:
hey bill ...exciting isnt?
what reg...flying with the queen n stuff?
yeah bill..of course
you know shes only gonna mate with one of us reg?
yeah...i s'pose so...
well look around mate these bleeding thousands of us
yeah youre right bill...nevermind...what you doing after?
after? after reg? there is no fucking after...!
what you mean bill...no after..ha ha (laughs nervously)
reg dont you know....we're all gonna die today..matey or no matey..
glum silence
*
yes the males all perish
none return to the nest
not even he who got lucky with her maj
anyway all the ants have come out from underground
and theyre a little excited to say the least
its like airforce day and empire day and a sexy tragedy
all in one hit
scarlet kilbey is standing among them
in one black uprush they ascend up her legs
in her sox
in her undies
nipping her white baby groin
biting her pink soft chubby legs
scarlet kilbey goes ballistic
screaming and dancing a weird ants in my pants dance
the game is over before its begun
we think we got em all off
and she starts wailing again
and we find another little bugger biting her for all its worth
the doodles play kubb while we see to scarlet
eves much better than aurora
so shes all mouthy and showing off
while aurora keeps flouncing off in a huff
everybodies going for it
so much for a quiet game
eventually me n nk get to play
(i won resoundingly)
and i became just like eve... all cocky
sigh
sigh
i drive up to blue mountains at 4
in my old falcon, tibor
we drive up into the mountains alone
much roadwork
much police
much argy bargy
i suddenly realise i need a ye olde wee wee
and i drive off main drag into the forest and get lost somehow
i have to retrace my steps out after much panic
i get to katoomba
which i dont particularly care for that much
find the carrington
a huge old hotel where queen vickie once had a bath
(or something)
the people having the wedding are very nice
piercings and tattoos abound
they are all mid thirties
the p.a. isnt very good
there is no stage
i just stand there near a table singing
i start with providence
its all crackling distorted n feeble
this eventually is rectified
while i play n sing
people talk n laugh
kids run around
dinner gets served
(yuck! its bloody steak or something!)
however
the bride n groom and a few of the guests
really love my music so i close my eyes n think of england
i do "let it be me" and a bunch of oldies cheer
i quite enjoy myself even under these far from perfect conditions
daniel is a great groom and longtime fan
he and quite a few others tell me
they grew up listening to me
its nice
im a little shy i guess but these folks are real nice
i am saddened to learn daniels mother died 2 weeks before wedding
they serve me a vegan meal
we do thought that i was over you with daniel singing in mike w/ me
i do milky way for bridal waltz
a good time was had by all
i finish up
i get paid
long boring drive home
listening to some church jams n marvelling
25 minute pieces of music
like entire sides of prog rock albums never released
i almost drift off to sleep a few times
but luckily was jolted back to awareness by some force
come home just after midnite
my wife in the darkness waiting patiently for me
mmmm
goodnight to all
Saturday, April 26, 2008
pommy whinger
feeling troubled and anxious myself
something not feeling right
worried about money
worried about the future
my ears ring
my teeth in bad shape
winter comes and everything seems a struggle
a million things to do
falling behind further and further
cannot keep up or hope to keep up with it all
red tape to go through
forms to fill in
appointments to keep
look in the mirror...getting old
(you are old!)
falling behind and slacking off with my disciplines
the bad habits and vices dominate
tonight i'm playing at someones wedding
its making me nervous too
i dont want to cock this gig up....
but i imagine that i could
yeah...playing at a wedding...the wedding singer
ha ha
ive done the parties here comes the weddings
actually the truth is i walk away with more money
from these types of gigs
than when i do the blah blah blah lounge in town
so...
i'm all confused
plus
i realise i'm still not "working" working, right?
i should be happy, i guess
but i always wanted more than i ever got
and i s'pose i'm like humanity in that way
anyhow seeing this IS my blog
i can confide that i always thought
something or someone would come along
recognize my "talent"
and somehow i could recover from the heroin days
when i lost everything i had
but
as time goes on n on
i cant see it ever happening
and i've become a bit of a jack of all trades
which is alright
in itself
but im not feeling real confident right now
in any way at all
any small wave coming along could sink the ship in fact
i know you all got the same worries as me
and none of this is anything new
nor can i come up with anything sunny today
even tho it is actually sunny outside in sydney
i feel cold broke and on the outside looking in
the inevitable moves in closer
and dreams recede
petty ambitions
petty obstructions
i see complete imbeciles living it large
and im filled with caustic envy and jealousy
i see injustice and evil and hopelessness
and im filled with impotent useless rage
i see this world and i feel nothing ever changes
just like me in microcosm
plagueing myself with the same old stuff
nothing much on the horizon
except more argy-bargy
more wrangling n jostling
more ducking n fuckin' weaving
this is how it is....
today....
yet we are changeable creatures
there is always hope....we hope
anyhow if you got kids you cant give up
which makes things even harder
you gotta try n put a good face on it
you gotta do your best
and you gotta do whatever you can
you do everything for the children
who grow up move out
and then it all starts all over for them
we are born into red tape and argy-bargy
we get sent to school for an "education"
which really means
programmed to fit into the system
the pre-existing system of civilization
the other beasts dont work so hard as us
they just live life in the moment
yeah
most of em got food n shelter and sex
the things that motivate humans...
but they dont sit in offices to get it
they dont drive trucks for thousands of miles
or dig ditches everyday
or lug boxes or make deliveries
or down mines in the dark
or up some pole fiddling with the wires
consider the dolphins who spend only 10 % of their time
catching fishies
the rest of the time they play and swim and presumably have "fun"
my old man worked 6 days a week his whole life
and he had his "fun" on sunday afternoon..if he had any energy
i used to think we humans had it made
but now im not so sure...
anyway
nothing you can really do about it
even if you recognize it
but....
couldnt it have been more than this?
im not complaining really
i got it easy...i know i know
its just....
something not feeling right
worried about money
worried about the future
my ears ring
my teeth in bad shape
winter comes and everything seems a struggle
a million things to do
falling behind further and further
cannot keep up or hope to keep up with it all
red tape to go through
forms to fill in
appointments to keep
look in the mirror...getting old
(you are old!)
falling behind and slacking off with my disciplines
the bad habits and vices dominate
tonight i'm playing at someones wedding
its making me nervous too
i dont want to cock this gig up....
but i imagine that i could
yeah...playing at a wedding...the wedding singer
ha ha
ive done the parties here comes the weddings
actually the truth is i walk away with more money
from these types of gigs
than when i do the blah blah blah lounge in town
so...
i'm all confused
plus
i realise i'm still not "working" working, right?
i should be happy, i guess
but i always wanted more than i ever got
and i s'pose i'm like humanity in that way
anyhow seeing this IS my blog
i can confide that i always thought
something or someone would come along
recognize my "talent"
and somehow i could recover from the heroin days
when i lost everything i had
but
as time goes on n on
i cant see it ever happening
and i've become a bit of a jack of all trades
which is alright
in itself
but im not feeling real confident right now
in any way at all
any small wave coming along could sink the ship in fact
i know you all got the same worries as me
and none of this is anything new
nor can i come up with anything sunny today
even tho it is actually sunny outside in sydney
i feel cold broke and on the outside looking in
the inevitable moves in closer
and dreams recede
petty ambitions
petty obstructions
i see complete imbeciles living it large
and im filled with caustic envy and jealousy
i see injustice and evil and hopelessness
and im filled with impotent useless rage
i see this world and i feel nothing ever changes
just like me in microcosm
plagueing myself with the same old stuff
nothing much on the horizon
except more argy-bargy
more wrangling n jostling
more ducking n fuckin' weaving
this is how it is....
today....
yet we are changeable creatures
there is always hope....we hope
anyhow if you got kids you cant give up
which makes things even harder
you gotta try n put a good face on it
you gotta do your best
and you gotta do whatever you can
you do everything for the children
who grow up move out
and then it all starts all over for them
we are born into red tape and argy-bargy
we get sent to school for an "education"
which really means
programmed to fit into the system
the pre-existing system of civilization
the other beasts dont work so hard as us
they just live life in the moment
yeah
most of em got food n shelter and sex
the things that motivate humans...
but they dont sit in offices to get it
they dont drive trucks for thousands of miles
or dig ditches everyday
or lug boxes or make deliveries
or down mines in the dark
or up some pole fiddling with the wires
consider the dolphins who spend only 10 % of their time
catching fishies
the rest of the time they play and swim and presumably have "fun"
my old man worked 6 days a week his whole life
and he had his "fun" on sunday afternoon..if he had any energy
i used to think we humans had it made
but now im not so sure...
anyway
nothing you can really do about it
even if you recognize it
but....
couldnt it have been more than this?
im not complaining really
i got it easy...i know i know
its just....
Friday, April 25, 2008
anzac day 08
i dont believe in war
today is the day australians and new zealanders
celebrate/mourn/remember our fallen countrymen
when i was growing up we were told they were our glorious dead
we were encouraged to believe that war was necessary part of life
and that if the empire called
we should give our lives gladly
im sorry
i never swallowed this propaganda
there is a park near here..the kids play there sometimes
a little monument to the young men
whose lives came to an inglorious end in turkey or europe
during WW1
there is an unusual name mckellar or something
and there are 5 or 6 of them there
some woman lost her father and her brothers and her sons
one after another mown down in some foreign mud somewhere...
can any one here tell me why those MILLIONS of young men died?
for the empire?
for the glory?
for the adventure?
to stop the bloody hun?
to me it seems an incredible inexplicable tragedy
that great war oh what a great war we're having...
barbed wire
mustard gas
machine guns
dysentry
mud
blood
guts
decay
pain and screaming
firing squads for deserters we now realise were shell-shocked
rah rah rah!
good old lord kitchener and his generals....tally ho
we'll give em what for eh boys?
keep dodging those bullets for another 4 years
youll get a little medal and maybe a pension
im sorry
i dont believe in war
miserymaker heartbreaker lovetaker
gallipoli, vietnam, crimea, korea
they keep selling us this lie
that war can solve things
that war is the only way
that its manly that its our duty
those young men who lost their lives
all of them
yes they were brave
yes they were courageous
yes they did their duty and made the ultimate sacrifice
but what good did it do?
we fought n fought for a few muddy miles in france
my grandfathers too
it was a lie
that they needed to die
we lied
the enemy lied
the kings horses n men lied
it was gruesome and pointless
in the way we attempt to glorify these dead soldiers
is contained the implication
that to die in some useless war is a worthy end
one can aspire to it...
so next time someone needs some dirtywork done
there will be more young men
to fling against the enemy
while the unscrupulous belligerent cowards
sit safe at home
unconcerned for the lady in bondi who lost every male member
of her family
wanna go to iraq?
saddams got the wmds i hear...
ok all aboard lets go!
cmon dont be slow
no need to wonder why
whoopee
we're all gonna die!
today is the day australians and new zealanders
celebrate/mourn/remember our fallen countrymen
when i was growing up we were told they were our glorious dead
we were encouraged to believe that war was necessary part of life
and that if the empire called
we should give our lives gladly
im sorry
i never swallowed this propaganda
there is a park near here..the kids play there sometimes
a little monument to the young men
whose lives came to an inglorious end in turkey or europe
during WW1
there is an unusual name mckellar or something
and there are 5 or 6 of them there
some woman lost her father and her brothers and her sons
one after another mown down in some foreign mud somewhere...
can any one here tell me why those MILLIONS of young men died?
for the empire?
for the glory?
for the adventure?
to stop the bloody hun?
to me it seems an incredible inexplicable tragedy
that great war oh what a great war we're having...
barbed wire
mustard gas
machine guns
dysentry
mud
blood
guts
decay
pain and screaming
firing squads for deserters we now realise were shell-shocked
rah rah rah!
good old lord kitchener and his generals....tally ho
we'll give em what for eh boys?
keep dodging those bullets for another 4 years
youll get a little medal and maybe a pension
im sorry
i dont believe in war
miserymaker heartbreaker lovetaker
gallipoli, vietnam, crimea, korea
they keep selling us this lie
that war can solve things
that war is the only way
that its manly that its our duty
those young men who lost their lives
all of them
yes they were brave
yes they were courageous
yes they did their duty and made the ultimate sacrifice
but what good did it do?
we fought n fought for a few muddy miles in france
my grandfathers too
it was a lie
that they needed to die
we lied
the enemy lied
the kings horses n men lied
it was gruesome and pointless
in the way we attempt to glorify these dead soldiers
is contained the implication
that to die in some useless war is a worthy end
one can aspire to it...
so next time someone needs some dirtywork done
there will be more young men
to fling against the enemy
while the unscrupulous belligerent cowards
sit safe at home
unconcerned for the lady in bondi who lost every male member
of her family
wanna go to iraq?
saddams got the wmds i hear...
ok all aboard lets go!
cmon dont be slow
no need to wonder why
whoopee
we're all gonna die!
Thursday, April 24, 2008
store in a cool dry place
renaissance man scoops every award!
(warning: this a fantasy, it may contain jokes!)
uh huh
thats right!
steve kilbeys amazing new talk show "renaissance man"
has won every major award in aust television
by harvey farbnuckle ent. reporter sydney morning heresy
steve kilbey was a happy man last night
as he walked away with five gold loogies
his fabulous new abc tv show renaissance man
winning every (in)conceivable prize at the 08 awards night
kilbey resplendent in a flannelette shirt and kmart trackpants
was cheered by his piers
as he peered out and peeked (and peaked ) (maybe piqued)
holding aloft his pangolin statuette
he pledged more bohemian antics for the next seasons blockbluster
tv mogul and tycoon sir roger swindlin'-hogg said:
kilbey is a breath of fresh air in an industry full of plastic lookalike fools
im tired of teethy game-hosts, over earnest female journos
and the boring non-entities like rover or over-the-hills
kilbey is the real thing
writes his own jokes
is as conversant on sumerian sexual customs or incan paper
as he is on pub rock or the footy
he sings he dances he can talk talk talk
hes debonair and everyman at once
a real wit
a real scholar
a real zany crazy baudelaire quoting juggernaut of a tv host..."
amazing special guests: dante, quetzalcoatl, dylan, sam sejavka
the wiggles(who performed excerpts from madame butterfly)
george w bush (who did a duet with kilbey on travel by thought)
tom cruise who told of his great love for remindlessness
and was joined by brad pitt n george clue-knee for an
emotional version of my birthday the moon festival
(with cruise on electric sitar, pitt on vocoder)
ed kuepper was a surprise guest too
chuckling his way through a medley of saints songs
and then joining kyle hand-shandyland
for an emotional tearfilled under the milky way (tonight)
during which both men declared their unswerving belief in kilbey
bring on those sixteenths sobbed the ecstatic brizzie ex-punk
while wollongongs own chubby ordinary yobbo made good kyle said
"kilbey must be convulsive...or not at all!"
the abcs ceo lord edward st. bill was delighted
calling kilbey "a tv phenonomen" and "a diamond geezer"
and promising more funds to be diverted to kilbeys vision
"quite frankly who gives a fuck about sport and news shows
when you got something as scintillating as "renaissance man" "
said the chief
"who cares who won the boring old rugby n election anyway?"
kilbey was celebrating at the g.e.microwave arena
"with a few thousand close friends"
and is reported to be ebullient about his win
"i can hock each of these babies for 500 bucks each" he said
holding a statuette up
as he pigged out on vegan cuisine and sloshed down berry v with jaeger
all 14 of his daughters were there
except petunia
who is studying african bagpipes at yale
kilbey had the final word
"yeah...but my feet and my nose are still FUCKING FREEZING!"
(warning: this a fantasy, it may contain jokes!)
uh huh
thats right!
steve kilbeys amazing new talk show "renaissance man"
has won every major award in aust television
by harvey farbnuckle ent. reporter sydney morning heresy
steve kilbey was a happy man last night
as he walked away with five gold loogies
his fabulous new abc tv show renaissance man
winning every (in)conceivable prize at the 08 awards night
kilbey resplendent in a flannelette shirt and kmart trackpants
was cheered by his piers
as he peered out and peeked (and peaked ) (maybe piqued)
holding aloft his pangolin statuette
he pledged more bohemian antics for the next seasons blockbluster
tv mogul and tycoon sir roger swindlin'-hogg said:
kilbey is a breath of fresh air in an industry full of plastic lookalike fools
im tired of teethy game-hosts, over earnest female journos
and the boring non-entities like rover or over-the-hills
kilbey is the real thing
writes his own jokes
is as conversant on sumerian sexual customs or incan paper
as he is on pub rock or the footy
he sings he dances he can talk talk talk
hes debonair and everyman at once
a real wit
a real scholar
a real zany crazy baudelaire quoting juggernaut of a tv host..."
amazing special guests: dante, quetzalcoatl, dylan, sam sejavka
the wiggles(who performed excerpts from madame butterfly)
george w bush (who did a duet with kilbey on travel by thought)
tom cruise who told of his great love for remindlessness
and was joined by brad pitt n george clue-knee for an
emotional version of my birthday the moon festival
(with cruise on electric sitar, pitt on vocoder)
ed kuepper was a surprise guest too
chuckling his way through a medley of saints songs
and then joining kyle hand-shandyland
for an emotional tearfilled under the milky way (tonight)
during which both men declared their unswerving belief in kilbey
bring on those sixteenths sobbed the ecstatic brizzie ex-punk
while wollongongs own chubby ordinary yobbo made good kyle said
"kilbey must be convulsive...or not at all!"
the abcs ceo lord edward st. bill was delighted
calling kilbey "a tv phenonomen" and "a diamond geezer"
and promising more funds to be diverted to kilbeys vision
"quite frankly who gives a fuck about sport and news shows
when you got something as scintillating as "renaissance man" "
said the chief
"who cares who won the boring old rugby n election anyway?"
kilbey was celebrating at the g.e.microwave arena
"with a few thousand close friends"
and is reported to be ebullient about his win
"i can hock each of these babies for 500 bucks each" he said
holding a statuette up
as he pigged out on vegan cuisine and sloshed down berry v with jaeger
all 14 of his daughters were there
except petunia
who is studying african bagpipes at yale
kilbey had the final word
"yeah...but my feet and my nose are still FUCKING FREEZING!"
Wednesday, April 23, 2008
mr showbiz :twinkletoes and a giggle
im giving myself a seven
im giving myself a seven for my singing n joking n
personalitying
its weird these tv shows
i am able (ironically) to converse in their lingos
but i'll never be a believer
yet there i was in the green room
sipping my jaeger n getting nervous
led down behind a curtain
they guess my name
im out
wow
the band starts to play my song
sing sing sing
cant hear voice as well as i want to
but you gotta play on
meet hostess whos (supposed) to be dizzy n mouthy
answer some questions...cant remember em now
laughy laughy laughy
then at the end
(my team won) (go the killer!) (go mangey panther!)
i do my "duet" with female guest
its ok we do it ok
suddenly its over!
that was it .....my assault on showbiz
everybody said i was good
my brother n daughters said good
i ended up at aftershowparty
eating a bowl of minestrone
talking to someone
who didnt realise i was joking
i was saying i wanted my own tv show
called renaissance man
that it would be me in a lonely library
outside a storm lashes the window with rain
a fire burns in the hearth
a golden retriever sits at my feet
a rolled up newspaper in its mouth
i swing round in my chair
dressed in a smoking jacket n cravat
i cradle a pipe in one hand
(sks special smoking blend)
i turn to the camera
i raise an eyebrow
and in my best british upper class accent
(and believe me...i do a jolly good one!)
i say
good eeevening
and welcome to "renaissance man"
the ninny still not realising their leg was being pulled was saying
fuck off now ya talking in an english accent!
oh dear...i really waste my time trying to amuse some people
what else will you talk about ? said the ninny
my world.. i say with a mock expansive gesture
oh yeah whatchya gonna tell my 14 year old then? they said
it wont be for 14 year olds i say...and sighing
such were my attempts at schmoozing..
i chatted briefly with em all
i believe my cheques in the mail
"smaller than you thought too" quips a camera guy
the band thought it was good as well
one of the best shows a bandmember says
hooray for mr showbiz
whooda thunk it
stevie kilbey that olde song n danceman
that quipping quoting singing laughing genie-arse
that avuncular skipping yoga-doing knucklehead
that vague n semi-vegan non-vapid rapid fire old trooper
anyway sit in hotelroom
with minna n john sleeping on in here
at least my kids saw me being a "star" for a minute
at midnight i get in lift
3 people in there
looking at me
they burst out laughing
great show!!!
can we get a picture with ya?
ok
its started...the recognition
next the paparazzi...?
the botox?
the toupe?
the corsets?
yeah..
bring it on!
im giving myself a seven for my singing n joking n
personalitying
its weird these tv shows
i am able (ironically) to converse in their lingos
but i'll never be a believer
yet there i was in the green room
sipping my jaeger n getting nervous
led down behind a curtain
they guess my name
im out
wow
the band starts to play my song
sing sing sing
cant hear voice as well as i want to
but you gotta play on
meet hostess whos (supposed) to be dizzy n mouthy
answer some questions...cant remember em now
laughy laughy laughy
then at the end
(my team won) (go the killer!) (go mangey panther!)
i do my "duet" with female guest
its ok we do it ok
suddenly its over!
that was it .....my assault on showbiz
everybody said i was good
my brother n daughters said good
i ended up at aftershowparty
eating a bowl of minestrone
talking to someone
who didnt realise i was joking
i was saying i wanted my own tv show
called renaissance man
that it would be me in a lonely library
outside a storm lashes the window with rain
a fire burns in the hearth
a golden retriever sits at my feet
a rolled up newspaper in its mouth
i swing round in my chair
dressed in a smoking jacket n cravat
i cradle a pipe in one hand
(sks special smoking blend)
i turn to the camera
i raise an eyebrow
and in my best british upper class accent
(and believe me...i do a jolly good one!)
i say
good eeevening
and welcome to "renaissance man"
the ninny still not realising their leg was being pulled was saying
fuck off now ya talking in an english accent!
oh dear...i really waste my time trying to amuse some people
what else will you talk about ? said the ninny
my world.. i say with a mock expansive gesture
oh yeah whatchya gonna tell my 14 year old then? they said
it wont be for 14 year olds i say...and sighing
such were my attempts at schmoozing..
i chatted briefly with em all
i believe my cheques in the mail
"smaller than you thought too" quips a camera guy
the band thought it was good as well
one of the best shows a bandmember says
hooray for mr showbiz
whooda thunk it
stevie kilbey that olde song n danceman
that quipping quoting singing laughing genie-arse
that avuncular skipping yoga-doing knucklehead
that vague n semi-vegan non-vapid rapid fire old trooper
anyway sit in hotelroom
with minna n john sleeping on in here
at least my kids saw me being a "star" for a minute
at midnight i get in lift
3 people in there
looking at me
they burst out laughing
great show!!!
can we get a picture with ya?
ok
its started...the recognition
next the paparazzi...?
the botox?
the toupe?
the corsets?
yeah..
bring it on!
Tuesday, April 22, 2008
missed teak
tonite
despite whatever i said before
im doing the tv show
why?
why not
with my new "one size fits all" persona
my startlingly youthful pizazz for an old geezer
(yoga n veganism)
with humour back on the agenda
with reintroducing myself
as avuncular smart dashing venerable idiot
refugee from the rocknroll wars
trippy stupid eccentric bopping fool
or whatever
a washed up ninny hoping for exposure
who can pinpoint the myriad causes that precipitate an event?
see
im fuckin' art-ic-u-late too baby
now dont ya forget aint too many articulate rockers
maybe im too fuckin articulate for my own good
cos im not the dumb savage type at all
but perhaps need more of that for balance
anyway
i went to rehearsal
everybodies lovely
everybodies relaxed
the band are very nice
actually theyre very good
the cream i mutter as i greet them
one guy oscillates between guitar n keys so easily
like speaking two languages at once
he sits there nursing the guitar and playing the keys
back n forth in one song
the bass n drums are immaculate in precision n professionalism
a quality i used to despise
but now i start to appreciate it
(DUH!)
theyre friendly geezers
we do my song
they do it nicely authentically
we run thru duet with the female guest
which she chose
a song of grants
not my first choice
but hey im easy going and it sounded ok
so im happy
everybody from tv show is very nice
i know it would be a better read if i was throwing a tanty
but i didnt
rehearsal was smooth sailing
im a vintage performer now
my origins are lost in the mists of time
i come on n do this 27 year old song
its just like the trees outside the window
there he is
some old white bearded fella
still quite trim despite the years
hes on the quiz show
hes singing his song
hes genial n relaxed n approachable
like any 53 year old should be
i write these words for myself
trying to understand who i am
what i do
and
how i can do it better
ive blown my mystique i know
years ago
in so many ways
i am now operating mystiqueless
unless you think my formidable abilities
is mystique in itself
or even just a silly sod
having 'imself on
a temporary blip
nothing special
still anxious to do a good job though
still wanna sing n be funny n make em want more
isnt that what im sposed to do?
i believe i can do any showbiz thing now
act
sing
entertain
magic tricks
diving off bridges
disappearing into thin air
im gonna be alright
i handle all terrain now
ive just done an hour of yoga n chi gong
im gonna go for walky
im gonna meet my daughters who are down here
at 730 i'll hit that stage
dazzlingly suave groovy rococco urbane mishmash of coolness
belting out the hits
and making the people chuckle
is that as noble an ambition as transcendence thru art?
maybe not....
but it is an exercise
in doing what you do do well
working within a given framework
and getting the most out
while putting the most in
and making it look easy
easy?
right on!
despite whatever i said before
im doing the tv show
why?
why not
with my new "one size fits all" persona
my startlingly youthful pizazz for an old geezer
(yoga n veganism)
with humour back on the agenda
with reintroducing myself
as avuncular smart dashing venerable idiot
refugee from the rocknroll wars
trippy stupid eccentric bopping fool
or whatever
a washed up ninny hoping for exposure
who can pinpoint the myriad causes that precipitate an event?
see
im fuckin' art-ic-u-late too baby
now dont ya forget aint too many articulate rockers
maybe im too fuckin articulate for my own good
cos im not the dumb savage type at all
but perhaps need more of that for balance
anyway
i went to rehearsal
everybodies lovely
everybodies relaxed
the band are very nice
actually theyre very good
the cream i mutter as i greet them
one guy oscillates between guitar n keys so easily
like speaking two languages at once
he sits there nursing the guitar and playing the keys
back n forth in one song
the bass n drums are immaculate in precision n professionalism
a quality i used to despise
but now i start to appreciate it
(DUH!)
theyre friendly geezers
we do my song
they do it nicely authentically
we run thru duet with the female guest
which she chose
a song of grants
not my first choice
but hey im easy going and it sounded ok
so im happy
everybody from tv show is very nice
i know it would be a better read if i was throwing a tanty
but i didnt
rehearsal was smooth sailing
im a vintage performer now
my origins are lost in the mists of time
i come on n do this 27 year old song
its just like the trees outside the window
there he is
some old white bearded fella
still quite trim despite the years
hes on the quiz show
hes singing his song
hes genial n relaxed n approachable
like any 53 year old should be
i write these words for myself
trying to understand who i am
what i do
and
how i can do it better
ive blown my mystique i know
years ago
in so many ways
i am now operating mystiqueless
unless you think my formidable abilities
is mystique in itself
or even just a silly sod
having 'imself on
a temporary blip
nothing special
still anxious to do a good job though
still wanna sing n be funny n make em want more
isnt that what im sposed to do?
i believe i can do any showbiz thing now
act
sing
entertain
magic tricks
diving off bridges
disappearing into thin air
im gonna be alright
i handle all terrain now
ive just done an hour of yoga n chi gong
im gonna go for walky
im gonna meet my daughters who are down here
at 730 i'll hit that stage
dazzlingly suave groovy rococco urbane mishmash of coolness
belting out the hits
and making the people chuckle
is that as noble an ambition as transcendence thru art?
maybe not....
but it is an exercise
in doing what you do do well
working within a given framework
and getting the most out
while putting the most in
and making it look easy
easy?
right on!
Sunday, April 20, 2008
pull pit pow!
the truth is
what we think of as the truth does not exist
the truth is all our truths are different
the world is a song
a million ways in
a million ways out
we have been raised to look for the definite
it does not exist
it is in flux
i search and search
sometimes like yesterday
on a windswept cliff
the wind howled in glee
misty rain droplets
the dark blue sea groping the land
an impatient ocean trying to get further in
and the clouds redefine grey into a thousand greys
rising and falling in the sky
you look at this and the answer is on the tip of your.....
the answer?
the answer??
there is no answer
each answer would lead to at least ten more questions anyway
it would take all our life to grasp even the smallest fact in totality
nonetheless certain tantalising keys seem to dangle
keys to understanding.....
keys to art
keys to success
keys to boogie woogie piano
whatever key you want
suddenly you realise....
ah! so this is.....
as things fall into place
and you move into finer realms
as you progress
your pride becomes heavier
and drags you down
you glimpsed the seven thousand lands of paradise
now your arrogance pins you to the ground
you begin to see
that not concentration..as you thought...
but its opposite
detachment
or rather
detachment within concentration
just like in yoga
when you push your limbs to maintain an asana
but your face n mind remain calm and peaceful
you have to be both things at once
you have to be able to believe the impossible
or scorn the obvious
could it be its all true
could it be its all false
why do sad songs make us happy
why do opposites attract...shouldnt likes attract?
a fine line between love n hate but arent they opposites?
occult advice for astral travel:
remain awake as you fall asleep!
that could take many lifetimes to master
you cant apply western force to it
yet one can see the possibilities flowering
behind the apparent conundrum
somewhere in nature
there are loopholes in her logic
which once manipulated could....
imagine if it was all tangential to what you thought
imagine if the givens were taken
look
i always thought there would be some big explosion of light
but the battle is not fought there
nor is the battle fought at all but only with surrender
can you defeat a temptation by indulging in it
can you love your enemies to death
can you remain alert in deep contemplation
can you traverse levels of your reality effortlessly
think without thinking
your mind...can it switch itself off
can you serve or save yourself
?
the schism between "their" realities
and mine
ever widens
a credibility gap they used to call it
getting harder to believe it
getting harder to swallow ..i need more sugar with it
the more i hide from it
the more exposure i need
everything is and contains its own opposite
life is a multitude of dilemmas
as you think you solve one
others pop out of alignment
theres no end in sight
no respite
it must continue it seems
warm n cosy moments are illusions
so too the hysterical and excruciating
all disappearing like white lines on a highway
stretch out and then gone
gone man gone
like elvis n jimbo n all them other dead'uns
gone into the distant distance
amen
what we think of as the truth does not exist
the truth is all our truths are different
the world is a song
a million ways in
a million ways out
we have been raised to look for the definite
it does not exist
it is in flux
i search and search
sometimes like yesterday
on a windswept cliff
the wind howled in glee
misty rain droplets
the dark blue sea groping the land
an impatient ocean trying to get further in
and the clouds redefine grey into a thousand greys
rising and falling in the sky
you look at this and the answer is on the tip of your.....
the answer?
the answer??
there is no answer
each answer would lead to at least ten more questions anyway
it would take all our life to grasp even the smallest fact in totality
nonetheless certain tantalising keys seem to dangle
keys to understanding.....
keys to art
keys to success
keys to boogie woogie piano
whatever key you want
suddenly you realise....
ah! so this is.....
as things fall into place
and you move into finer realms
as you progress
your pride becomes heavier
and drags you down
you glimpsed the seven thousand lands of paradise
now your arrogance pins you to the ground
you begin to see
that not concentration..as you thought...
but its opposite
detachment
or rather
detachment within concentration
just like in yoga
when you push your limbs to maintain an asana
but your face n mind remain calm and peaceful
you have to be both things at once
you have to be able to believe the impossible
or scorn the obvious
could it be its all true
could it be its all false
why do sad songs make us happy
why do opposites attract...shouldnt likes attract?
a fine line between love n hate but arent they opposites?
occult advice for astral travel:
remain awake as you fall asleep!
that could take many lifetimes to master
you cant apply western force to it
yet one can see the possibilities flowering
behind the apparent conundrum
somewhere in nature
there are loopholes in her logic
which once manipulated could....
imagine if it was all tangential to what you thought
imagine if the givens were taken
look
i always thought there would be some big explosion of light
but the battle is not fought there
nor is the battle fought at all but only with surrender
can you defeat a temptation by indulging in it
can you love your enemies to death
can you remain alert in deep contemplation
can you traverse levels of your reality effortlessly
think without thinking
your mind...can it switch itself off
can you serve or save yourself
?
the schism between "their" realities
and mine
ever widens
a credibility gap they used to call it
getting harder to believe it
getting harder to swallow ..i need more sugar with it
the more i hide from it
the more exposure i need
everything is and contains its own opposite
life is a multitude of dilemmas
as you think you solve one
others pop out of alignment
theres no end in sight
no respite
it must continue it seems
warm n cosy moments are illusions
so too the hysterical and excruciating
all disappearing like white lines on a highway
stretch out and then gone
gone man gone
like elvis n jimbo n all them other dead'uns
gone into the distant distance
amen
Saturday, April 19, 2008
jims mirror
the light of a byegone afternoon
yeah i recognize it
everything yellowish white
everything curving around itself
the writhing vegetation
the branches in the trees rub against each other
the trees are eroticised
and they touch each others bark lewdly
nature succumbs to love
palm trees shaking and nodding
gardenias move off their faces in joy
clouds manifest human-like shapes
and fuck in the sky
gently raining down
the colours all have numbers and voices
bass purple 9
contralto red 33
bees arrive
precise and identical
some of the cactii are in juicy bloom
suggestive pink fleshy protusions
how did i arrive here?
through the mirror
which was soft and hazy
like cotton wool
or a slight gentle resistance
jim sitting in his otherworld
jim with his huge blue beard
jim with the swirling changing hair
jim under some other sun
sitting thinking
ice cold beer and mexican weed
writing some poetry in his book
we are flames...
morrison writes
...and we burn eternally inside cold white cages
the system w/ its spears
girls come and stay intent on sleep
girls from nevada and utah and sword
little honey melts in my car
i pull up outside the blue sky motel
her luggage w/snakegun
the cops drift by in their movietone dream
tasting moms apple pie and bombe alaska
later in the pool in the Kool night
as she sinks almost lifeless
sharks circle w/ one thousand ideas
her fingers touch their weeping eyes as they devour her
softly monsters she seems to say
and as i turn the key in the door of room 13
unlocking a past
your father appears in his flannel suit
making polite conversation as
i sit on the bed watching you shower
out there ...l.a..pulses with a sick unaffordable force
i know you
says your father w/ his soft voice....
what do you think? jimbo asks me
as i read over his shoulder in the garden
and his technicolor hair swirls a day-glo vortex
yeah its great i guess
i hear myself say
adding some lilac to his hair
that flows away like a rippling wave
under the eddies and currents of his wild hippy poet hair...
the air charges in full of purple and orange light
electricity crackles and discharges
the garden is in a frenzy
the clouds turn big and black as they rut above
thunderclaps
jim sits there
his hair blowing wildly
his black jacket with the collar flap
his black t shirt against his paleskin
he turns and stares at the rain and wind
and he looks like a wild elvis or elijah
i try to freeze the picture
and the mirror cracks deep
shards of the sky w/blood
blue and red
no reflection
yeah i recognize it
everything yellowish white
everything curving around itself
the writhing vegetation
the branches in the trees rub against each other
the trees are eroticised
and they touch each others bark lewdly
nature succumbs to love
palm trees shaking and nodding
gardenias move off their faces in joy
clouds manifest human-like shapes
and fuck in the sky
gently raining down
the colours all have numbers and voices
bass purple 9
contralto red 33
bees arrive
precise and identical
some of the cactii are in juicy bloom
suggestive pink fleshy protusions
how did i arrive here?
through the mirror
which was soft and hazy
like cotton wool
or a slight gentle resistance
jim sitting in his otherworld
jim with his huge blue beard
jim with the swirling changing hair
jim under some other sun
sitting thinking
ice cold beer and mexican weed
writing some poetry in his book
we are flames...
morrison writes
...and we burn eternally inside cold white cages
the system w/ its spears
girls come and stay intent on sleep
girls from nevada and utah and sword
little honey melts in my car
i pull up outside the blue sky motel
her luggage w/snakegun
the cops drift by in their movietone dream
tasting moms apple pie and bombe alaska
later in the pool in the Kool night
as she sinks almost lifeless
sharks circle w/ one thousand ideas
her fingers touch their weeping eyes as they devour her
softly monsters she seems to say
and as i turn the key in the door of room 13
unlocking a past
your father appears in his flannel suit
making polite conversation as
i sit on the bed watching you shower
out there ...l.a..pulses with a sick unaffordable force
i know you
says your father w/ his soft voice....
what do you think? jimbo asks me
as i read over his shoulder in the garden
and his technicolor hair swirls a day-glo vortex
yeah its great i guess
i hear myself say
adding some lilac to his hair
that flows away like a rippling wave
under the eddies and currents of his wild hippy poet hair...
the air charges in full of purple and orange light
electricity crackles and discharges
the garden is in a frenzy
the clouds turn big and black as they rut above
thunderclaps
jim sits there
his hair blowing wildly
his black jacket with the collar flap
his black t shirt against his paleskin
he turns and stares at the rain and wind
and he looks like a wild elvis or elijah
i try to freeze the picture
and the mirror cracks deep
shards of the sky w/blood
blue and red
no reflection
Friday, April 18, 2008
mind stem jolt brain
horrible dreams and aches pursue me still
things eating (at) me
things put off till tomorrow
well now tomorrow was months ago
i walk through the darkened house
into my room where i type my rants
one of the greek girls downstairs is dating a real "straight"
his lovely black gleaming car is parked downstairs
his moon roof has been left undone
and oh dear ....its raining...
possessed by this sight
i stand like a gleeful moron
watching the rain going in his nice car
an angel on my right shoulder says
steven go down and tell them!
the devil on the left says
oh ha ha ha ha!!
the devil on the left shoulder also says to the angel
ma'am ...youre wasting your breath today...he's mine
the rain picks up a little
the killer smiles
i become the killer
the killer smiles again or scowls
both his desks are piled 4 inches high with stuff
like an old alchemist all confused
mixing up the wrong mixtures
transmuting gold into lead
scrying for tiny daemons
the killer is doing a painting of jim morrison
there he sits on my paper
iridescent metallic blue green white flames flare from his head
his hair is a swirling sea of gold silver and bright colours
his face is one tone bluey pink with a kind of photo realism
his beard is blue a solid mass of blue but it needs doing more
jimbo jimbo jimbo.....ah
yeah i mean great i guess
i mean i dunno
girl leaves downstairs
uh oh the other girls boyfriend has parked very close
in his big black fast car
she..oh..the cars are all dirty and wet
yet she is forced to squeeze herself between them to gain access
she gets her door open
just
then she flops down into seat sideways
she sits there and looks up
she sees the roof is open about 6 inches
she sits there a bit longer brushing at water
then suddenly
she feels her wet bum
and jumps out of the car but slowly
cos its a tight fit
oh distress oh pity
the stupid little devil laughs himself silly
the angel asks
but what about the yoga
but what about the sage..
what about her wet arse sniggers the devil again
launching himself into coughs and splutters
the killer loses interest in this malarkey
back to the serious things whatever they are
financial monsters are slowly growing
picking up their inevitable interest
their fine print and fines
they give and then they take
bamboozling me in sticky debt
broke like an old string
hammers and tax
crunch must be coming
yes yes
tomorrow tomorrow
and all the rest too
today however
i am attending a college in the eastern subs
where i will be talking about songwriting for one hour
and earning 110 dollars
not exactly a fortune
but not to be sneezed at neither
i hope its better than some of my other forays in education
lets face it i'm not the teacher type
im all over the place
and im talking in terms
yer average aussie punter
doing time at an art college
so he can still get the dole
he just doesnt understand what im talking about....
plus
would a real songwriter
go to songwriting school?
my use of any lessons or tips
ive ever had or gleaned
were to augment my own self instruction
i taught myself to write n play n sing n paint n blogge
and it really shows... chuckles the devil on my shoulder
i overhear a coversation in the kitchen
and i poke my head round the door
mum can i read you a story? asks eve
brandishing a book about animals
its called the lion she says
dad wont like it says aurora
why not ?says mum
its got meat in it she says
he doesnt mind lions eating meat do you? mum asks
i think all lions should eat tempeh ! i say
they like my jimbo picture
one of your best ever they all say
the drizzle still drizzles
yeah teacher teach us a songman
after that im gonna play bass on someones record
then im meeting a friend at a cafe in bondi
the future seems foreboding
sydney is enveloped in a rainy mist
i dont feel cosy or comfortable
i feel raw
waiting for the chop
on notice
under observation
bills wend their way
next week a tv show and a wedding
wedding made me offer i couldnt refuse
im a jack of all fucking trades now
does your hedge needing bustling
does your guitar need elocution lessons
want a voiceover on your wedding nite
(cos my dulcet tones n cool accent are way better than the grooms)
(go man go !says little devil)
would you consider a little ambiguity with your fries
howabout a dong over the head with a fender bass?
thatll make you see some sense
you nailed it says devil
you nailed it!
things eating (at) me
things put off till tomorrow
well now tomorrow was months ago
i walk through the darkened house
into my room where i type my rants
one of the greek girls downstairs is dating a real "straight"
his lovely black gleaming car is parked downstairs
his moon roof has been left undone
and oh dear ....its raining...
possessed by this sight
i stand like a gleeful moron
watching the rain going in his nice car
an angel on my right shoulder says
steven go down and tell them!
the devil on the left says
oh ha ha ha ha!!
the devil on the left shoulder also says to the angel
ma'am ...youre wasting your breath today...he's mine
the rain picks up a little
the killer smiles
i become the killer
the killer smiles again or scowls
both his desks are piled 4 inches high with stuff
like an old alchemist all confused
mixing up the wrong mixtures
transmuting gold into lead
scrying for tiny daemons
the killer is doing a painting of jim morrison
there he sits on my paper
iridescent metallic blue green white flames flare from his head
his hair is a swirling sea of gold silver and bright colours
his face is one tone bluey pink with a kind of photo realism
his beard is blue a solid mass of blue but it needs doing more
jimbo jimbo jimbo.....ah
yeah i mean great i guess
i mean i dunno
girl leaves downstairs
uh oh the other girls boyfriend has parked very close
in his big black fast car
she..oh..the cars are all dirty and wet
yet she is forced to squeeze herself between them to gain access
she gets her door open
just
then she flops down into seat sideways
she sits there and looks up
she sees the roof is open about 6 inches
she sits there a bit longer brushing at water
then suddenly
she feels her wet bum
and jumps out of the car but slowly
cos its a tight fit
oh distress oh pity
the stupid little devil laughs himself silly
the angel asks
but what about the yoga
but what about the sage..
what about her wet arse sniggers the devil again
launching himself into coughs and splutters
the killer loses interest in this malarkey
back to the serious things whatever they are
financial monsters are slowly growing
picking up their inevitable interest
their fine print and fines
they give and then they take
bamboozling me in sticky debt
broke like an old string
hammers and tax
crunch must be coming
yes yes
tomorrow tomorrow
and all the rest too
today however
i am attending a college in the eastern subs
where i will be talking about songwriting for one hour
and earning 110 dollars
not exactly a fortune
but not to be sneezed at neither
i hope its better than some of my other forays in education
lets face it i'm not the teacher type
im all over the place
and im talking in terms
yer average aussie punter
doing time at an art college
so he can still get the dole
he just doesnt understand what im talking about....
plus
would a real songwriter
go to songwriting school?
my use of any lessons or tips
ive ever had or gleaned
were to augment my own self instruction
i taught myself to write n play n sing n paint n blogge
and it really shows... chuckles the devil on my shoulder
i overhear a coversation in the kitchen
and i poke my head round the door
mum can i read you a story? asks eve
brandishing a book about animals
its called the lion she says
dad wont like it says aurora
why not ?says mum
its got meat in it she says
he doesnt mind lions eating meat do you? mum asks
i think all lions should eat tempeh ! i say
they like my jimbo picture
one of your best ever they all say
the drizzle still drizzles
yeah teacher teach us a songman
after that im gonna play bass on someones record
then im meeting a friend at a cafe in bondi
the future seems foreboding
sydney is enveloped in a rainy mist
i dont feel cosy or comfortable
i feel raw
waiting for the chop
on notice
under observation
bills wend their way
next week a tv show and a wedding
wedding made me offer i couldnt refuse
im a jack of all fucking trades now
does your hedge needing bustling
does your guitar need elocution lessons
want a voiceover on your wedding nite
(cos my dulcet tones n cool accent are way better than the grooms)
(go man go !says little devil)
would you consider a little ambiguity with your fries
howabout a dong over the head with a fender bass?
thatll make you see some sense
you nailed it says devil
you nailed it!
Thursday, April 17, 2008
frazzle
persecutions complex
grey drizzle dawn mounts and muzzles bondi beach
some tourists resort
to anything
between my shoulders..that old ache
the years
conflict
anger
holding it in
holding it back
i nuzzle sleep who recedes and recedes
half relieved to escape ultra vivid scenes on dreams screens
a non-believer
hammering at rats with my shoe
lost in a mansfield st wilderness of pain
a white fog of smack fizzles to black morning of fear
utterly alone in a cold and hurting house
no one comes
the minutes congeal into solid state time
each second is razor edged slicing me open
the cuts go deep into being
timecuts flay timebeing
no one knocks at my dooranymore
no one rings me but the bank asking for its moneyback
the goodtimes oh they seem so far behind
so longa go
all my lives living side by side
my scams gather round me
screaming at me
i can never outrun them
whining lies
the garden is cold and full of spiders
the empty cubby house with mouldy toys
those little birds flew the coop
rats in the roof scratch and scramble
me, im out of everything
cars drive by outside
sydney grinds into action
the world swirls by somehow out there but its unreachable
defeated on my feet
knocked out loaded
absorbing hit after hit
throw down the towel over and over
entropic necrotic
less serotonin than a stone
the hours are ropes i bounce off
while my invisible opponent
slugs me under the skin
punchdrunk and hobbling
a footprint of my former selves
i submit to any yoke
the ceiling is a void
it calls my dead soul
which cannot leave that screaming body
its all mixed up
i enter some semi-bardo state
some formless realm
within my dream
and i am only pain
pains spirit incorporeal
embedded in some unspeakable torment
a wraith twisting and untwisting
unwanted anywhere
trying to leave but there is nowhere else
time has not stopped
it never was
never
no time
no being
no right or wrong
no lyneham high
no bass guitar
no floral shirts
no gigs in melbourne
no smokes no drinks no girls
no friends no enemies
no records to make
no appointments to cancel
no dealers to ring
no money to pay
no prospects no future
what do you have then?
just memories
all writhing with malice
all distorted by time
all faded in the fog
all withered in the draconian winter
endless
grey drizzle dawn mounts and muzzles bondi beach
some tourists resort
to anything
between my shoulders..that old ache
the years
conflict
anger
holding it in
holding it back
i nuzzle sleep who recedes and recedes
half relieved to escape ultra vivid scenes on dreams screens
a non-believer
hammering at rats with my shoe
lost in a mansfield st wilderness of pain
a white fog of smack fizzles to black morning of fear
utterly alone in a cold and hurting house
no one comes
the minutes congeal into solid state time
each second is razor edged slicing me open
the cuts go deep into being
timecuts flay timebeing
no one knocks at my dooranymore
no one rings me but the bank asking for its moneyback
the goodtimes oh they seem so far behind
so longa go
all my lives living side by side
my scams gather round me
screaming at me
i can never outrun them
whining lies
the garden is cold and full of spiders
the empty cubby house with mouldy toys
those little birds flew the coop
rats in the roof scratch and scramble
me, im out of everything
cars drive by outside
sydney grinds into action
the world swirls by somehow out there but its unreachable
defeated on my feet
knocked out loaded
absorbing hit after hit
throw down the towel over and over
entropic necrotic
less serotonin than a stone
the hours are ropes i bounce off
while my invisible opponent
slugs me under the skin
punchdrunk and hobbling
a footprint of my former selves
i submit to any yoke
the ceiling is a void
it calls my dead soul
which cannot leave that screaming body
its all mixed up
i enter some semi-bardo state
some formless realm
within my dream
and i am only pain
pains spirit incorporeal
embedded in some unspeakable torment
a wraith twisting and untwisting
unwanted anywhere
trying to leave but there is nowhere else
time has not stopped
it never was
never
no time
no being
no right or wrong
no lyneham high
no bass guitar
no floral shirts
no gigs in melbourne
no smokes no drinks no girls
no friends no enemies
no records to make
no appointments to cancel
no dealers to ring
no money to pay
no prospects no future
what do you have then?
just memories
all writhing with malice
all distorted by time
all faded in the fog
all withered in the draconian winter
endless
Wednesday, April 16, 2008
the prophet margin
my friend mem
the artist tarot designer and all round tripper
sent me this book
2012
interesting stuff
talking about the coming end of life as we know it
2012 the deadline
the maya predicted it
plus a few others
the book is about many things strangely close to my heart
prophecy
south american pre spanish civilizations
ayahuasca..the power and the light
mushrooms n acid
man/woman...the inherent dilemmas
intuition and pseudo-intuition
the gods and the devils
the very nature of reality
art and its purposes
yeah
its bloody good reading if you like that stuff
uh huh
and i was digging where mr daniel pinchbeck
was coming from
highly intellectual and a great dabbler in the psychedelics
a brave man
he goes to africa where he takes iboga with the bwiti tribe
oh dear kilbey much too cowardly for that lark
according to the magic botanists
the iboga can be seen as a masculine
to the ayahuascas feminine
he had taken it and it was very IN YOUR FACE!!!
my god...its one that i dont want to try..
he goes to burning man festival in the nevada desert
(or is it utah?)
and takes military uppers n loadsa psychedelics
he goes to the amazon and has the aya
and has some lovely visions on it
pinchbeck like me
indulges in drugs not merely for kicks
but out of a genuine need to explore the inner realms
accessible only by some discipline(martial arts, yoga etc)
or by plants that i and he believes
were put on this planet for humanities evolution
and god dont we need it...
his descriptions of the psychedelic state are excellent
its hard to find words sometimes but he does
he struggles with transmissions from outside sources
and oscillates between delusions of grandeur
and feeling sore and sorry
(just like the time being)
he digs up some cool quotes and examples
and will turn you on to some great authors
ok
at the end of the book
mr pinchbeck actually sorta posits himself
mr daniel pinchbeck
this scrawny sickly new york leftie intellectual
as quetzalcoatl
mexican god
who will herald the new age
the apocalypse
a collapse of old structures
the exterior ones
and
the interior ones
he also sorta says
that he believes himself to be an incarnation of ashoka
an important buddhist emperor beloved of the gods
whoah!
can you imagine if i was saying this sorta thing...??!
i am nonplussed
he even prints out part of the transmission
and im sorry to say this daniel
it just didnt feel like the stuff a god (or archetype) would say
it sounds like you
it sounds like your language
im sorry daniel
as a bit of a poet
i reckon quetz would have more linguistic chop
even if english aint his 1st language
and he would reveal........more....?
look im not sneering
this is an impressive book
but there some mighty impressive claims
where would you go from there?
how would you expect people to treat you?
what happens when/if 2013 rolls around
and we're sitting here with the same old bunch
doing the same old things
what will he say then...?
actually myself
before his incredible revelation of who he (thinks he) is
i was thinking
yes
so this is my task too
with music and blogge and art and vegan rants
to help usher in this newtime
at the end of time
believe me somethings got to give
the maya were very enigmatic and canny people
if they say something will happen in 2012
i believe it possibly will
quetzlpinchbeck says
it will be a revolution of the heart
god i hope hes right
how amazing if it happens in my lifetime
quite frankly i was a little disappointed by the ending
im amazed at his sheer gall in coming to this conclusion
i admire his balls too
apparently this book is now a runaway best seller
well hes gonna be a rich scrawny little god at any rate
perhaps it is quetzalcoatl talking
nothing would surprise me..
perhaps danny succumbed to the delusions
of a drug ravaged mind
perhaps it seemed a good ending for his book
or...
why not?
all of the above
which is quite possible
me myself
i am the god dionysus
come to earth bringing intoxication and ceremonial love
i usher in this age with my approaching new record
painkiller
i am the reincarnation of dr john dee and dante and lancelot-du-lac
i weild music and words that cause your soul to remember
i am a door
i am a springboard
i am a clue
i am a dichotomy
i am both weak and strong
i am both right and wrong
i am the real deal
with my grey beard and eyes
i truly sing the body electrique
i have explored the inner realms
i have traveled this planet
my message is not for everyone
i have learned
i am learning
i have erred
i have fallen
i have made amends
i am back on track
i will deliver and be delivered
i will save and be saved
ladies and gentlemen
whoever may be out there
i am locked on
i can be thrown off
but i will never be shaken
i will persevere
i am the time being
my message is not for everyone
i am no leader
i am no schoolteacher
i am no boss or chief
i am an individual
i follow my own tortuous glorious path
i have known exultation and degradation
my band is called the church
because the music we play is from our souls
my prophecies are in my songs
numbers was my own confused transmission of 911
two years before it happened
i told ya the ice was melting down down down in 86
i told ya to travel by thought in 83
i told ya bout the empty place in 80
i told ya a lotta stuff that was just lyrics too
stuff that was just there for aesthetic reasons
you see
thats me
babblebabblegeniusbabble babble babblemoregenius babble
i gotta get that ratio looking better
still its better than most of the pure babble out there
you know what i can do
you know my failings
possibly chuckle at them
maybe they reflect your own failings
and it irks thee
no one is more human than me
i come complete with many faults and failings
it is my job to dismantle them
i got off to a slow start
i only jumped into real action a few years ago
in my late forties
late steve kilbey
early cos hes got nowhere else to go
i tell you this and i tell you true
i work hard on my creations
even though they come easily to me
i am unbelievably switched on
whatever the fuck that means
but go do yoga for five years straight
be vegan-ish
and explore your mind with mother nature
and you will be in a different place
than a flabby exjunkie drinking milk
eating horrible eggs and having no discipline
i look in the mirror and i see deep lines and old skin
i see my hair is thinner
my teeth are chipped and yellower
my beard becoming whiter and whiter
but i see the sharp ascetic features
of good old style prophet seer or sage too
out of my old faces
emerging a new visage
a kinder face
sadder wiser eyes
bigger smile
i am the time being
there is no other
i am uninfluenced by anyone or anything
i am an original
my creations will go on giving all your life
i am he who am the only one
my face is young and gold and silvery old
i move like a panther on tartex spread
i fulfill the ancient words
i am from nineveh
i am of the priest cast
confess everything to me
bishop still equals handjob
is it love that makes us rock?
mechanical bird of prey sing for your emperor
i am erskine
i am new man
i am the killer
i am the fool
i am nothing special
i am a conduit and a channel
i am a washed up popsinger no one remembers
i am my fathers son
i am steve fucking kilbey
the story goes on
you know who i ams
this is a new day
can any of us help
the maya prophecy
that 2012
will be a revolution of the heart
become a reality
and let the "good" guys
have a shot
at running things
in
a
more
loving
sensible
way
?
the artist tarot designer and all round tripper
sent me this book
2012
interesting stuff
talking about the coming end of life as we know it
2012 the deadline
the maya predicted it
plus a few others
the book is about many things strangely close to my heart
prophecy
south american pre spanish civilizations
ayahuasca..the power and the light
mushrooms n acid
man/woman...the inherent dilemmas
intuition and pseudo-intuition
the gods and the devils
the very nature of reality
art and its purposes
yeah
its bloody good reading if you like that stuff
uh huh
and i was digging where mr daniel pinchbeck
was coming from
highly intellectual and a great dabbler in the psychedelics
a brave man
he goes to africa where he takes iboga with the bwiti tribe
oh dear kilbey much too cowardly for that lark
according to the magic botanists
the iboga can be seen as a masculine
to the ayahuascas feminine
he had taken it and it was very IN YOUR FACE!!!
my god...its one that i dont want to try..
he goes to burning man festival in the nevada desert
(or is it utah?)
and takes military uppers n loadsa psychedelics
he goes to the amazon and has the aya
and has some lovely visions on it
pinchbeck like me
indulges in drugs not merely for kicks
but out of a genuine need to explore the inner realms
accessible only by some discipline(martial arts, yoga etc)
or by plants that i and he believes
were put on this planet for humanities evolution
and god dont we need it...
his descriptions of the psychedelic state are excellent
its hard to find words sometimes but he does
he struggles with transmissions from outside sources
and oscillates between delusions of grandeur
and feeling sore and sorry
(just like the time being)
he digs up some cool quotes and examples
and will turn you on to some great authors
ok
at the end of the book
mr pinchbeck actually sorta posits himself
mr daniel pinchbeck
this scrawny sickly new york leftie intellectual
as quetzalcoatl
mexican god
who will herald the new age
the apocalypse
a collapse of old structures
the exterior ones
and
the interior ones
he also sorta says
that he believes himself to be an incarnation of ashoka
an important buddhist emperor beloved of the gods
whoah!
can you imagine if i was saying this sorta thing...??!
i am nonplussed
he even prints out part of the transmission
and im sorry to say this daniel
it just didnt feel like the stuff a god (or archetype) would say
it sounds like you
it sounds like your language
im sorry daniel
as a bit of a poet
i reckon quetz would have more linguistic chop
even if english aint his 1st language
and he would reveal........more....?
look im not sneering
this is an impressive book
but there some mighty impressive claims
where would you go from there?
how would you expect people to treat you?
what happens when/if 2013 rolls around
and we're sitting here with the same old bunch
doing the same old things
what will he say then...?
actually myself
before his incredible revelation of who he (thinks he) is
i was thinking
yes
so this is my task too
with music and blogge and art and vegan rants
to help usher in this newtime
at the end of time
believe me somethings got to give
the maya were very enigmatic and canny people
if they say something will happen in 2012
i believe it possibly will
quetzlpinchbeck says
it will be a revolution of the heart
god i hope hes right
how amazing if it happens in my lifetime
quite frankly i was a little disappointed by the ending
im amazed at his sheer gall in coming to this conclusion
i admire his balls too
apparently this book is now a runaway best seller
well hes gonna be a rich scrawny little god at any rate
perhaps it is quetzalcoatl talking
nothing would surprise me..
perhaps danny succumbed to the delusions
of a drug ravaged mind
perhaps it seemed a good ending for his book
or...
why not?
all of the above
which is quite possible
me myself
i am the god dionysus
come to earth bringing intoxication and ceremonial love
i usher in this age with my approaching new record
painkiller
i am the reincarnation of dr john dee and dante and lancelot-du-lac
i weild music and words that cause your soul to remember
i am a door
i am a springboard
i am a clue
i am a dichotomy
i am both weak and strong
i am both right and wrong
i am the real deal
with my grey beard and eyes
i truly sing the body electrique
i have explored the inner realms
i have traveled this planet
my message is not for everyone
i have learned
i am learning
i have erred
i have fallen
i have made amends
i am back on track
i will deliver and be delivered
i will save and be saved
ladies and gentlemen
whoever may be out there
i am locked on
i can be thrown off
but i will never be shaken
i will persevere
i am the time being
my message is not for everyone
i am no leader
i am no schoolteacher
i am no boss or chief
i am an individual
i follow my own tortuous glorious path
i have known exultation and degradation
my band is called the church
because the music we play is from our souls
my prophecies are in my songs
numbers was my own confused transmission of 911
two years before it happened
i told ya the ice was melting down down down in 86
i told ya to travel by thought in 83
i told ya bout the empty place in 80
i told ya a lotta stuff that was just lyrics too
stuff that was just there for aesthetic reasons
you see
thats me
babblebabblegeniusbabble babble babblemoregenius babble
i gotta get that ratio looking better
still its better than most of the pure babble out there
you know what i can do
you know my failings
possibly chuckle at them
maybe they reflect your own failings
and it irks thee
no one is more human than me
i come complete with many faults and failings
it is my job to dismantle them
i got off to a slow start
i only jumped into real action a few years ago
in my late forties
late steve kilbey
early cos hes got nowhere else to go
i tell you this and i tell you true
i work hard on my creations
even though they come easily to me
i am unbelievably switched on
whatever the fuck that means
but go do yoga for five years straight
be vegan-ish
and explore your mind with mother nature
and you will be in a different place
than a flabby exjunkie drinking milk
eating horrible eggs and having no discipline
i look in the mirror and i see deep lines and old skin
i see my hair is thinner
my teeth are chipped and yellower
my beard becoming whiter and whiter
but i see the sharp ascetic features
of good old style prophet seer or sage too
out of my old faces
emerging a new visage
a kinder face
sadder wiser eyes
bigger smile
i am the time being
there is no other
i am uninfluenced by anyone or anything
i am an original
my creations will go on giving all your life
i am he who am the only one
my face is young and gold and silvery old
i move like a panther on tartex spread
i fulfill the ancient words
i am from nineveh
i am of the priest cast
confess everything to me
bishop still equals handjob
is it love that makes us rock?
mechanical bird of prey sing for your emperor
i am erskine
i am new man
i am the killer
i am the fool
i am nothing special
i am a conduit and a channel
i am a washed up popsinger no one remembers
i am my fathers son
i am steve fucking kilbey
the story goes on
you know who i ams
this is a new day
can any of us help
the maya prophecy
that 2012
will be a revolution of the heart
become a reality
and let the "good" guys
have a shot
at running things
in
a
more
loving
sensible
way
?
Tuesday, April 15, 2008
unrepentant and defiant
the time being with all his paper
the daughters of time using up the future
pierced in the side by his own arrows
loved by his devotees
scorned by the dull carnivorous ninnies
somehow attracted to him
hurling abuse and malice
prompted by their misunderstood love for him
nevertheless they read and read on
and they listen to the music
and they grow deceitful and envious
threatening him
parading their inanities
why?
why not give in to the great love
they hold for this man
this man they secretly worship so much
they feel compelled and driven
to contradict and mock his sage words
oh sad day for ninnies...
if they really didnt love him
they would leave
yet they remain
trying to think of new ways to needle
this saintly man
this handsome clever man
player of many instruments
writer of music and words
this kindly olde fellow
this venerable and veritable king
alas
his message is not for everyone
to my dearest ones around the world i now say this
i appreciate your deep love
know now that it is reciprocated a hundredfold
it saddens me to see you desert my side
yet if that truly be your path
then go forward in good stead
also know this
i have been a fool
to attack the idiocies spouted by the ninnies
i should never have got involved
i will no longer comment on my comments
i am permanently disabling anons
i can no longer suffer their impudence
and for a while
my blogges will be written
in a sense of isolation
as i ponder my own follies
and those of the general hoi polloi
dont lose heart
eventually
time will prevail over all
try another life
st steven
wounded by love
wounded by hatred
the holy city of bondi, many leagues hence
54 tbe
the daughters of time using up the future
pierced in the side by his own arrows
loved by his devotees
scorned by the dull carnivorous ninnies
somehow attracted to him
hurling abuse and malice
prompted by their misunderstood love for him
nevertheless they read and read on
and they listen to the music
and they grow deceitful and envious
threatening him
parading their inanities
why?
why not give in to the great love
they hold for this man
this man they secretly worship so much
they feel compelled and driven
to contradict and mock his sage words
oh sad day for ninnies...
if they really didnt love him
they would leave
yet they remain
trying to think of new ways to needle
this saintly man
this handsome clever man
player of many instruments
writer of music and words
this kindly olde fellow
this venerable and veritable king
alas
his message is not for everyone
to my dearest ones around the world i now say this
i appreciate your deep love
know now that it is reciprocated a hundredfold
it saddens me to see you desert my side
yet if that truly be your path
then go forward in good stead
also know this
i have been a fool
to attack the idiocies spouted by the ninnies
i should never have got involved
i will no longer comment on my comments
i am permanently disabling anons
i can no longer suffer their impudence
and for a while
my blogges will be written
in a sense of isolation
as i ponder my own follies
and those of the general hoi polloi
dont lose heart
eventually
time will prevail over all
try another life
st steven
wounded by love
wounded by hatred
the holy city of bondi, many leagues hence
54 tbe
Monday, April 14, 2008
i pity the poor hippygrunt
the west.......
uh, i dunno
it is so hard to detach from your culture
to see it for what it is through other(s) eyes
so hard to escape the zeitgeist
if we were raised eating worms
most of us would still be eating them
if we were raised and told that turnips were poisonous
we would avoid them
we are preprogrammed
we do not think freely
we swallow whatever they dish up
hooked headline and stinker
we are so buried in our own cultures baloney
we cant see which way is up
now the west has sold you a couple of ideas
i persistently go on about these ideas
on n on non anon
these ideas are at the very crux of our civilization
you see the angry ignorant responses on my comments
one chap says
without meat we will all starve...
and i should be on opera windfree show
with my zany dribble..
well my friend
let me reiterate this
the united nations
as well as many u.s. n u.k. studies conclude
that the meat industry is the single greatest contributing factor
to this planets critical condition
thats not my opinion
its the experts...at least whoever is the experts today
you see
the extraordinary amounts of cowdung n piss
the fact it takes 9 pounds of soy to produce one pound of beef
(beef :a cute word for a bit of decaying dismembered cow...long dead)
and that cattle farming destroys the soil
and the refrigeration
etc
you see
one day you gonna be asked to give up your kobe beef
if it gets even more critical with the weather
hopefully meat will be outlawed
it is after all
inhumane bloodthirsty macabre and it produces
ignorant meatheads who are actually addicted to the gore (like gore)
it causes cancer heart attack stroke and stupidity
it brings much misery down on our planet
it brings bad karma (oooh hippy dribble)
anyway how was the kobe beef
you wont shit it out for 3 days or so
so your intestines can get to know it real intimately
as your weak digestive juice slowly slowly
but ineffectually attempt to break it down
no mr kobe beef
we dont have that same acidic juice of the carnivores
ooh mr kobe beef
its rotting in your tummy, my son
your tummy is not a freezer
have you seen a piece of meat 3 days out of a freezer?
and its backed up
behind all the other various grisly remains
that sit putrefying inside you
rotting within your stomach, my dear friend
all that decay
and chemicals
and adrenaline from the dead miserable creature
and.....
jesus i know
im never gonna change your mind, am i?
nevertheless
now
no longer an ethical crusade
meat has been officially ascertained
as enemy number ONE of planet earth
you can now do whatever you like...
hey sometimes the u.n. are right though
remember all those weapons of mass destruction
they said mr s hussein didnt have?
funny
do you remember a couple of years ago
when i was self righteously ranting against iraqi war
and i'd have a hundred furious comments
saying i was all kinds of things
a coward
hitler
an idiot
brainwashed
unpatriotic
etc
yet i hear nothing these days
not one squeak of protest when i broach this
or maybe
they all pissed off when we had the big veg schism
hmmm
interesting correlation isnt it...?
the other big stupid lie the west esp u.s.
have sold us
we the people
is that the plants herbs and trees of this planet
the plants that bring visions
healing
insights
creativity
realignment
etc
they have sold us the idea that these plants are "wrong"
i have said most of this before
but just one more time
up until 1900 there were no such things as illegal drugs
it was a matter of personal choice
of course , i guess
the witch burners set alight many healers and wise-women
who were skilled in herbal lore
an early example of ignorant repression by a certain type of man
the type of man who fears the feminine
who fears mysticism
who fears philosophy
who fears to create
who fears the unknown
who fears the ineffable wonder of nature
who scoffs at god(s)
who clings to his safe ignorance
parrotting his masters ignorance
the bishops
and generals
and the "law"
the secret agents
the "war" presidents, deserters themselves
the lords and kings
trotting out the bullshit of the time
a man with no ritual
a man with no culture
a man unable to create anything of beauty and charm
a fearful cynical man
feeling all safe in his cynicism and cliches
you see "drugs" were made illegal in the 1900s
to bust blacks n intellectuals n the poor n asians n whoever else
they werent made illegal for your own good
come on...do you really believe that?
and they teach you to fear and ridicule the people who use them
those stupid witchdoctors in the jungles
those stupid hippy trippy hippies with their peace n flower bullshit
i mean..peace n fucking flowers...how useless is that?
the western govts say these illegal drugs are "wrong"
people taking them are so naughty
that they are jailed and even executed
tim leary spent years in jail for possessing a joint
god
what did they fear?
the west govt made a whole loada stuff illegal
creating an instant blackmarket
full of crime prostituton smuggling corruption
that did not previously exist
do you ever hear much about the drug problems
in other times and places....?
nope
your own governments created it!
more marijuana smokers in u.s. jails than ever
why?
to keep them from harming themselves?
to deter them from crime?
because the govt said dont do it
but they did n now goddamn it we gotta show em
will society collapse if people smoke dope?
some kids beat up a guy n smoked pot..ban pot
some kids beat up a guy n ate a sandwich..ban sandwiches
ok
take me
i been smoking dope 36 years
i mean it cant be too bad, can it?
i mean
my resting pulse is 55
my blood pressure is low man low
i am 54 nearly
i swim a mile
i walk 2 or 3 miles
i do 1 and a half hours of yoga
i write a blog
i raise my kids
i pay my taxes
i produce much artistic work
i donate monthly to 2 charities :greenpeace n heart foundation
i perform concerts i travel i meet n greet
i love my mother
i dont beat my wife or kids
i dont steal rob or create trouble
i am quite sane
i am quite lucid
i continue to improve at singing playing writing
i mix socially with people
i am fit healthy productive and peaceful
should i go to jail?
am i just a stoned wanker?
am i the cliche?
or you?
you
where have you travelled?
what have you seen?
have you ever explored other states of mind
other planes
other universe within nature
do you write poetry
can you stand on a fucking stage
and keep people amused for 3 hours?
or are you a cog in the mechanism
mouthing the trueisms...?
the hippies failed
yes they did
the "straights" prevailed
yes they did
the psychedelic revolution of the heart of the sixties
was crushed and ridiculed
all those hippy wankers
stoned stupid
tripping peacenik fools
the western govts (the rest mostly cowed by the u.s.)
have told you that the psychedelic plants on this planet
are wrong
are evil
they wage wars on these plants
destroying and burning
just like a real inquisitor does
just like a real witchburner or nazi bookburner
just like superstitious cavemen
suppressing thought that differs from their own
trampling all over your "rights"
ask yourself this straightman
why do they fear the psychedelics so vehemently?
answer: ignorance
uh, i dunno
it is so hard to detach from your culture
to see it for what it is through other(s) eyes
so hard to escape the zeitgeist
if we were raised eating worms
most of us would still be eating them
if we were raised and told that turnips were poisonous
we would avoid them
we are preprogrammed
we do not think freely
we swallow whatever they dish up
hooked headline and stinker
we are so buried in our own cultures baloney
we cant see which way is up
now the west has sold you a couple of ideas
i persistently go on about these ideas
on n on non anon
these ideas are at the very crux of our civilization
you see the angry ignorant responses on my comments
one chap says
without meat we will all starve...
and i should be on opera windfree show
with my zany dribble..
well my friend
let me reiterate this
the united nations
as well as many u.s. n u.k. studies conclude
that the meat industry is the single greatest contributing factor
to this planets critical condition
thats not my opinion
its the experts...at least whoever is the experts today
you see
the extraordinary amounts of cowdung n piss
the fact it takes 9 pounds of soy to produce one pound of beef
(beef :a cute word for a bit of decaying dismembered cow...long dead)
and that cattle farming destroys the soil
and the refrigeration
etc
you see
one day you gonna be asked to give up your kobe beef
if it gets even more critical with the weather
hopefully meat will be outlawed
it is after all
inhumane bloodthirsty macabre and it produces
ignorant meatheads who are actually addicted to the gore (like gore)
it causes cancer heart attack stroke and stupidity
it brings much misery down on our planet
it brings bad karma (oooh hippy dribble)
anyway how was the kobe beef
you wont shit it out for 3 days or so
so your intestines can get to know it real intimately
as your weak digestive juice slowly slowly
but ineffectually attempt to break it down
no mr kobe beef
we dont have that same acidic juice of the carnivores
ooh mr kobe beef
its rotting in your tummy, my son
your tummy is not a freezer
have you seen a piece of meat 3 days out of a freezer?
and its backed up
behind all the other various grisly remains
that sit putrefying inside you
rotting within your stomach, my dear friend
all that decay
and chemicals
and adrenaline from the dead miserable creature
and.....
jesus i know
im never gonna change your mind, am i?
nevertheless
now
no longer an ethical crusade
meat has been officially ascertained
as enemy number ONE of planet earth
you can now do whatever you like...
hey sometimes the u.n. are right though
remember all those weapons of mass destruction
they said mr s hussein didnt have?
funny
do you remember a couple of years ago
when i was self righteously ranting against iraqi war
and i'd have a hundred furious comments
saying i was all kinds of things
a coward
hitler
an idiot
brainwashed
unpatriotic
etc
yet i hear nothing these days
not one squeak of protest when i broach this
or maybe
they all pissed off when we had the big veg schism
hmmm
interesting correlation isnt it...?
the other big stupid lie the west esp u.s.
have sold us
we the people
is that the plants herbs and trees of this planet
the plants that bring visions
healing
insights
creativity
realignment
etc
they have sold us the idea that these plants are "wrong"
i have said most of this before
but just one more time
up until 1900 there were no such things as illegal drugs
it was a matter of personal choice
of course , i guess
the witch burners set alight many healers and wise-women
who were skilled in herbal lore
an early example of ignorant repression by a certain type of man
the type of man who fears the feminine
who fears mysticism
who fears philosophy
who fears to create
who fears the unknown
who fears the ineffable wonder of nature
who scoffs at god(s)
who clings to his safe ignorance
parrotting his masters ignorance
the bishops
and generals
and the "law"
the secret agents
the "war" presidents, deserters themselves
the lords and kings
trotting out the bullshit of the time
a man with no ritual
a man with no culture
a man unable to create anything of beauty and charm
a fearful cynical man
feeling all safe in his cynicism and cliches
you see "drugs" were made illegal in the 1900s
to bust blacks n intellectuals n the poor n asians n whoever else
they werent made illegal for your own good
come on...do you really believe that?
and they teach you to fear and ridicule the people who use them
those stupid witchdoctors in the jungles
those stupid hippy trippy hippies with their peace n flower bullshit
i mean..peace n fucking flowers...how useless is that?
the western govts say these illegal drugs are "wrong"
people taking them are so naughty
that they are jailed and even executed
tim leary spent years in jail for possessing a joint
god
what did they fear?
the west govt made a whole loada stuff illegal
creating an instant blackmarket
full of crime prostituton smuggling corruption
that did not previously exist
do you ever hear much about the drug problems
in other times and places....?
nope
your own governments created it!
more marijuana smokers in u.s. jails than ever
why?
to keep them from harming themselves?
to deter them from crime?
because the govt said dont do it
but they did n now goddamn it we gotta show em
will society collapse if people smoke dope?
some kids beat up a guy n smoked pot..ban pot
some kids beat up a guy n ate a sandwich..ban sandwiches
ok
take me
i been smoking dope 36 years
i mean it cant be too bad, can it?
i mean
my resting pulse is 55
my blood pressure is low man low
i am 54 nearly
i swim a mile
i walk 2 or 3 miles
i do 1 and a half hours of yoga
i write a blog
i raise my kids
i pay my taxes
i produce much artistic work
i donate monthly to 2 charities :greenpeace n heart foundation
i perform concerts i travel i meet n greet
i love my mother
i dont beat my wife or kids
i dont steal rob or create trouble
i am quite sane
i am quite lucid
i continue to improve at singing playing writing
i mix socially with people
i am fit healthy productive and peaceful
should i go to jail?
am i just a stoned wanker?
am i the cliche?
or you?
you
where have you travelled?
what have you seen?
have you ever explored other states of mind
other planes
other universe within nature
do you write poetry
can you stand on a fucking stage
and keep people amused for 3 hours?
or are you a cog in the mechanism
mouthing the trueisms...?
the hippies failed
yes they did
the "straights" prevailed
yes they did
the psychedelic revolution of the heart of the sixties
was crushed and ridiculed
all those hippy wankers
stoned stupid
tripping peacenik fools
the western govts (the rest mostly cowed by the u.s.)
have told you that the psychedelic plants on this planet
are wrong
are evil
they wage wars on these plants
destroying and burning
just like a real inquisitor does
just like a real witchburner or nazi bookburner
just like superstitious cavemen
suppressing thought that differs from their own
trampling all over your "rights"
ask yourself this straightman
why do they fear the psychedelics so vehemently?
answer: ignorance
Sunday, April 13, 2008
the most original sin
i am the time being
in some ways a fool
i have also been given insight
i believe every idiot has a genius inside them
it just depends on how thick the membrane is
separating the idiot you from the deep genius within
i dont know about you
but i lived a million times before this
i been everything
rock animal star twig worm human alien
i contain a thousand painters
i contain a thousand musicians
i contain a thousand poets
i contain a thousand lovers
these lives i have led
what separates me from their memories..?
buddha on gaining enlightenment
could see his previous lives sliding back
one after another
he could see them all
his evolution towards simplicity...
the memories are there in all of us
hypnosis gives us fractured murky glimpses
a snatch of conversation here
an event or face there
children, particularly those born in india or tibet
where reincarnation is a fact of lives
children who remember their lastlife
children born speaking a language fluently
sometimes even dead languages
children born speaking some lost lingo
they gotta get some toffy prof to identify it
children with insane musical ability
children who have been growing and growing
through lifetime after lifetime
suddenly that membrane ruptures
that elusive nonexistent membrane..
so real nonetheless
go on
i dare you
remember before "you" were born
nope nothing coming to me
but
by the magical power of yoga
which i have practised diligently now some 5 years
everyday
yoga meaning yoke or union
if you think yoga is just a bunch of exercises
youre mistaken
unfortunately you'll never know till you try
in many ways sk parallels his ibook G4
the killer has NEVER played around with his i-movie
with his garage band
never uses his entourage or a million other things built in
i been using it to write blogs
send emails
maybe watch some naughty stuff
maybe read some rocknroll drivel
but mainly really
its potential is unrealised
ah...
no we humans have other powers n abilities
yoga helps facilitate this
yoga gradually melts the membrane
makes it get thinner n thinner
like the enamel on my poor teeth
yoga grinds down the membrane
yoga the pursuit of stillness and paradox
yoga union with all selves
yoga union with unified field
unity past present future
yoga is a mystery
you never know what yoga will do
ha ha ha
i done the hard yards
the unrewarding bit
like learning your latin conjugations
or going over your minor scales
you gotta practise ;diligence is required
you gotta have faith like that greek guy said
anyway yoga is doing its job
just as age is doing its job
age pulls me apart
yoga reassembles me
yoga whispers
here try a little clairvoyance
try a little soul
try a little merging in the wonderful one
all is one
i am part of all
yoga gently destroy the western paradigm
yoga making me strong in body and mind
yoga making me see
see things i cannot say
subtle power
subtle strength
subtle charm
and then theres drugs
drugs is a bad word
drug has negative western connotations
fuck all that!
i am a free spirit and i am a citizen of earth
the beautiful earth
oh my planet
you are in dialogue with those who have ears to listen
you provide medicines and elixirs
with your lovely plants
you communicate with us
magically
yes
the visions the journeys the astral travel
the breakthroughs into pure creativity
some jump forward
the western govts sold us a lie
mushrooms
the vine
dmt
marijuana
these things
these holy gifts these sacraments
created by nature
aligning with specific receptors in man
did nature produce an abomination in dmt?
isnt this substance already present in our pineal gland?
the pineal aka the seat of the soul
the us govt made dmt a class a drug
they have said
like olde jealous cranky jehovah said
if you eat this of this tree
(dmt comes from bark)
you will be as gods (like him)
the govt dont want you smoking dmt
is it because they are so concerned for your health?
oh ha ha hardy ha
yes sir
would you like an uzi machine gun?
would you like a cigarette?
would you like a micro wave?
would you like some meat?
would you like some deforestation?
would you like some iraqi war?
would you like some neglect in the face of disaster?
but im sorry sir
the govt is protecting you for your own good
we believe dmt is evil
we believe its bad for you
we are protecting you
drugs are for addicts and madmen
they harm our society
we have given you alcohol (not a drug, a poison!)
we have given you tobacco
we have given you valium and thalidomide
we have invented tranquilizers so you can be tranquil
but this dmt....
we believe in order
we believe in being sensible
we believe everyman has a right to a steak and eggs
the united nations may have indeed reported
that becoming vegan is the fastest way to redress this earths sickness
(US! US! A HUMAN MALIGNANCY! WE HAVE MADE HER SICK!)
and big fat old al gore and all the rest
are they fuckin vegans yet?
are they driving their half electric lexus munching a mcatrocity
ignoring the obvious
cos theyre so addicted to dead meat
(i dont wanna earth if i cant have meat)
they chopping down the HOLY AMAZON
the lungs of this planet
home of shamans and the vine
look
i was right about meat 30 years ago
i predicted it would be outlawed in my lifetime
and now i believe it will come to pass
they laughed at me then
i say all war is terrorism
i say meat and murder and ignorance
is as much part of western thought
as shakespeare and rodin and steve fucking kilbey
the current regimes will disintegrate
the criminals will be punished
if not in this life
then the next
when george bush reincarnates as a kid in some country
where an imperialist imbecile who rigged an election
has just dropped a smart bomb on his street
and bits of his mummy and daddy are lying all around
when cheney reincarnates as a fat parasitic worm in
connie rices large intestine
when the dmt is handed out
and guns are non existent
when leaders are visionaries a la gandhi
when ignorance is abhored
when the rednecks turn on
when the klan trip
when the president is a yogi and a shaman
fuck yeah!
thats my kinda world
make it happen
go
do it!
we can!
save the world!
vegan
yogic
vegetal magic
lovemaker
singer
dancer
surfer
peace and the light of love
but first
we have to take out the garbage n trash
coming soon near you...
utopia
in some ways a fool
i have also been given insight
i believe every idiot has a genius inside them
it just depends on how thick the membrane is
separating the idiot you from the deep genius within
i dont know about you
but i lived a million times before this
i been everything
rock animal star twig worm human alien
i contain a thousand painters
i contain a thousand musicians
i contain a thousand poets
i contain a thousand lovers
these lives i have led
what separates me from their memories..?
buddha on gaining enlightenment
could see his previous lives sliding back
one after another
he could see them all
his evolution towards simplicity...
the memories are there in all of us
hypnosis gives us fractured murky glimpses
a snatch of conversation here
an event or face there
children, particularly those born in india or tibet
where reincarnation is a fact of lives
children who remember their lastlife
children born speaking a language fluently
sometimes even dead languages
children born speaking some lost lingo
they gotta get some toffy prof to identify it
children with insane musical ability
children who have been growing and growing
through lifetime after lifetime
suddenly that membrane ruptures
that elusive nonexistent membrane..
so real nonetheless
go on
i dare you
remember before "you" were born
nope nothing coming to me
but
by the magical power of yoga
which i have practised diligently now some 5 years
everyday
yoga meaning yoke or union
if you think yoga is just a bunch of exercises
youre mistaken
unfortunately you'll never know till you try
in many ways sk parallels his ibook G4
the killer has NEVER played around with his i-movie
with his garage band
never uses his entourage or a million other things built in
i been using it to write blogs
send emails
maybe watch some naughty stuff
maybe read some rocknroll drivel
but mainly really
its potential is unrealised
ah...
no we humans have other powers n abilities
yoga helps facilitate this
yoga gradually melts the membrane
makes it get thinner n thinner
like the enamel on my poor teeth
yoga grinds down the membrane
yoga the pursuit of stillness and paradox
yoga union with all selves
yoga union with unified field
unity past present future
yoga is a mystery
you never know what yoga will do
ha ha ha
i done the hard yards
the unrewarding bit
like learning your latin conjugations
or going over your minor scales
you gotta practise ;diligence is required
you gotta have faith like that greek guy said
anyway yoga is doing its job
just as age is doing its job
age pulls me apart
yoga reassembles me
yoga whispers
here try a little clairvoyance
try a little soul
try a little merging in the wonderful one
all is one
i am part of all
yoga gently destroy the western paradigm
yoga making me strong in body and mind
yoga making me see
see things i cannot say
subtle power
subtle strength
subtle charm
and then theres drugs
drugs is a bad word
drug has negative western connotations
fuck all that!
i am a free spirit and i am a citizen of earth
the beautiful earth
oh my planet
you are in dialogue with those who have ears to listen
you provide medicines and elixirs
with your lovely plants
you communicate with us
magically
yes
the visions the journeys the astral travel
the breakthroughs into pure creativity
some jump forward
the western govts sold us a lie
mushrooms
the vine
dmt
marijuana
these things
these holy gifts these sacraments
created by nature
aligning with specific receptors in man
did nature produce an abomination in dmt?
isnt this substance already present in our pineal gland?
the pineal aka the seat of the soul
the us govt made dmt a class a drug
they have said
like olde jealous cranky jehovah said
if you eat this of this tree
(dmt comes from bark)
you will be as gods (like him)
the govt dont want you smoking dmt
is it because they are so concerned for your health?
oh ha ha hardy ha
yes sir
would you like an uzi machine gun?
would you like a cigarette?
would you like a micro wave?
would you like some meat?
would you like some deforestation?
would you like some iraqi war?
would you like some neglect in the face of disaster?
but im sorry sir
the govt is protecting you for your own good
we believe dmt is evil
we believe its bad for you
we are protecting you
drugs are for addicts and madmen
they harm our society
we have given you alcohol (not a drug, a poison!)
we have given you tobacco
we have given you valium and thalidomide
we have invented tranquilizers so you can be tranquil
but this dmt....
we believe in order
we believe in being sensible
we believe everyman has a right to a steak and eggs
the united nations may have indeed reported
that becoming vegan is the fastest way to redress this earths sickness
(US! US! A HUMAN MALIGNANCY! WE HAVE MADE HER SICK!)
and big fat old al gore and all the rest
are they fuckin vegans yet?
are they driving their half electric lexus munching a mcatrocity
ignoring the obvious
cos theyre so addicted to dead meat
(i dont wanna earth if i cant have meat)
they chopping down the HOLY AMAZON
the lungs of this planet
home of shamans and the vine
look
i was right about meat 30 years ago
i predicted it would be outlawed in my lifetime
and now i believe it will come to pass
they laughed at me then
i say all war is terrorism
i say meat and murder and ignorance
is as much part of western thought
as shakespeare and rodin and steve fucking kilbey
the current regimes will disintegrate
the criminals will be punished
if not in this life
then the next
when george bush reincarnates as a kid in some country
where an imperialist imbecile who rigged an election
has just dropped a smart bomb on his street
and bits of his mummy and daddy are lying all around
when cheney reincarnates as a fat parasitic worm in
connie rices large intestine
when the dmt is handed out
and guns are non existent
when leaders are visionaries a la gandhi
when ignorance is abhored
when the rednecks turn on
when the klan trip
when the president is a yogi and a shaman
fuck yeah!
thats my kinda world
make it happen
go
do it!
we can!
save the world!
vegan
yogic
vegetal magic
lovemaker
singer
dancer
surfer
peace and the light of love
but first
we have to take out the garbage n trash
coming soon near you...
utopia
Saturday, April 12, 2008
killazilla versus the bunbun girl
talk about david n go-lightly
talk about uneven
the killer weighing in at 183 pounds of flesh
the poor lil bunbun girl
bbg:hey do you like japanese animation?
no!
bbg:hey do you like japanese food?
i like age dashi dofu without the shaved fish
i like tofu teriaki
i like udon noodles
bbg:ok...do you like to visit japan , spend a little money?
quite frankly i cant afford it
bbg:ok how you like some japanese grannies come to bondi
take digital picture of your babyscarlet?
how you like a new sony lobe-implant
with clock/radio/barometer..?
we put solar panel in your head
it go and go longtime
can connect to most apple products...
what about my bass guitar?
bbg: jack or rca?
we put dock just behind ears..
cranium natural reverb chamber
no need for ampli-frier ever again...
wow bunbun girl...maybe i should come to japan after all
bbg: yes just now for only 3500 new euro dollars *
you get:
3 nights in hotel cell with free astro boy tv and snack machine
1 lump of complimentary horseradish
authentic balsa wood chop stick
get the geisha makeup treatment at mrs tonahakas hair n nails
2 tickets for scenic n historic subway ride
a visit to dae-woo factory
riuchi sacka-motos new exclusive bonzai pianos
hang out with actor who played the horse in "monkey"
by the way killazilla,
did you know that people here love new south whales?
ha ha! thats just a joke for you
if you like rocknroll
then we have the tokyo sputnik boyz
who do swedish punk band covers in japanese
or we have mika mikahoto a virtual pop star
here on japanese internet
she comes fully interactive...
parents should advise front desk
for this service to be deactivated
you can purchase any top movie at anytime
including such blockbusters as
ninja whinger: a henpecked swordsman slips up..whoops!
and the popular right now
desperately seeking bunbun girl
starring hundreds of different bun bun girls...
hang on bunbun girl...theres more than one bunbun girl?
bbg: oh yes there at least one million bunbun girls
some girls only can be onebun girl, you know
but my sister for example
she a bunbunbunbun girl or quad-bun
you can gain or lose buns you see...
are there any bunbun boys over there?
bbg: what? oh ha ha..i get it..you from sydney.oh ha ha
no actually no bunbun boys but we have ballball boys..
i hope to marry ballball boy one day
raise little balls n buns of our own....
land of the rising bun, eh?
bbg: what...? oh you very funny
you could be dingding man in my country easy...
ok bye now
contact me on bunbun.org.nip
* could be up to ten times this amount
see financial institution for more money
time being: ah, and only yesterday i was a sage....
(sigh)
the end
talk about uneven
the killer weighing in at 183 pounds of flesh
the poor lil bunbun girl
bbg:hey do you like japanese animation?
no!
bbg:hey do you like japanese food?
i like age dashi dofu without the shaved fish
i like tofu teriaki
i like udon noodles
bbg:ok...do you like to visit japan , spend a little money?
quite frankly i cant afford it
bbg:ok how you like some japanese grannies come to bondi
take digital picture of your babyscarlet?
how you like a new sony lobe-implant
with clock/radio/barometer..?
we put solar panel in your head
it go and go longtime
can connect to most apple products...
what about my bass guitar?
bbg: jack or rca?
we put dock just behind ears..
cranium natural reverb chamber
no need for ampli-frier ever again...
wow bunbun girl...maybe i should come to japan after all
bbg: yes just now for only 3500 new euro dollars *
you get:
3 nights in hotel cell with free astro boy tv and snack machine
1 lump of complimentary horseradish
authentic balsa wood chop stick
get the geisha makeup treatment at mrs tonahakas hair n nails
2 tickets for scenic n historic subway ride
a visit to dae-woo factory
riuchi sacka-motos new exclusive bonzai pianos
hang out with actor who played the horse in "monkey"
by the way killazilla,
did you know that people here love new south whales?
ha ha! thats just a joke for you
if you like rocknroll
then we have the tokyo sputnik boyz
who do swedish punk band covers in japanese
or we have mika mikahoto a virtual pop star
here on japanese internet
she comes fully interactive...
parents should advise front desk
for this service to be deactivated
you can purchase any top movie at anytime
including such blockbusters as
ninja whinger: a henpecked swordsman slips up..whoops!
and the popular right now
desperately seeking bunbun girl
starring hundreds of different bun bun girls...
hang on bunbun girl...theres more than one bunbun girl?
bbg: oh yes there at least one million bunbun girls
some girls only can be onebun girl, you know
but my sister for example
she a bunbunbunbun girl or quad-bun
you can gain or lose buns you see...
are there any bunbun boys over there?
bbg: what? oh ha ha..i get it..you from sydney.oh ha ha
no actually no bunbun boys but we have ballball boys..
i hope to marry ballball boy one day
raise little balls n buns of our own....
land of the rising bun, eh?
bbg: what...? oh you very funny
you could be dingding man in my country easy...
ok bye now
contact me on bunbun.org.nip
* could be up to ten times this amount
see financial institution for more money
time being: ah, and only yesterday i was a sage....
(sigh)
the end
Friday, April 11, 2008
nip it in the buddha
oh boy
seems i lucked out
n actually wrote something "sage" yesterday
so today
i have the choice
keep going with the sage
or
profane as usual
now aint that a human thing to do
you know its this...or its that
when really
the sacred doth indeed contain the profane
and surely vice versa
last night after enjoying the ripened fruits of conjugal love
i fell into a deep deep slumber
from which my wife couldnt wake me
eventually she must have fallen asleep
and we were lying back to back
in my dream arcs of emerald green energy bound us
the energy connected us at every nadi
there was intelligence behind the energy
soothing calm
it was everywhere
awake during sleep
i dreamed up deep of this feeling
it was like we were within a cage of pure shooting light
i could feel my wife sleeping so deep and peacefully
just beyond her the baby
love taking on the form of flesh
our passion now personified
blissfully knocked out in some naughty little girl world
in her dreams scarlet wades through nutella marshes
with her dora backpack full of the littlest pets
the night was milky grey
a warmish breeze barely made the blinds move
in my dream julian the magician appeared
there he was quite matter o fact
its all happening , isnt it he said
he was hyper real
he was superimposed on the other thing
like a sports commentator might appear on top of the footy
julian hung around for a while
i could see the weave of his rust coloured jumper
i could see him eating wattle seed yoghurt
n having a cheeky laugh
its all happening, isnt it he said again
i said to him
are you somewhere travelling down the vine
are you floating in some dmt sky?
maybe i am he said
whys it all happening? i ask him
julian likes people to do their own thinking though
he doesnt trot out some old stupid answer
he looks at me
he says
i know you
i know who you are
am i ready? i ask
he laughs a little cruelly at this
no he says
my questions start bubbling out
why not? when will i? how should it?
hes looking at me again
slightly shaking his head
why ask me? he telepaths at me
all the answers are with you
in you
in everyone
julian grins and pisses off
to whatever strange plane he was hanging out in
the energy grid was still connecting me n my wife
its true i said to myself
isnt it?
what? said my stupid "left" brain
the answer?
no said mcsage
the buddha of eastern suburbia
there are no answers
there are no questions
there just is
there is an "is"
and it just "is"
oh said left lobe
and they both went back to sleep
ps
both wife and i
very recharged this morning
mmmm yes
thank you to all concerned!
seems i lucked out
n actually wrote something "sage" yesterday
so today
i have the choice
keep going with the sage
or
profane as usual
now aint that a human thing to do
you know its this...or its that
when really
the sacred doth indeed contain the profane
and surely vice versa
last night after enjoying the ripened fruits of conjugal love
i fell into a deep deep slumber
from which my wife couldnt wake me
eventually she must have fallen asleep
and we were lying back to back
in my dream arcs of emerald green energy bound us
the energy connected us at every nadi
there was intelligence behind the energy
soothing calm
it was everywhere
awake during sleep
i dreamed up deep of this feeling
it was like we were within a cage of pure shooting light
i could feel my wife sleeping so deep and peacefully
just beyond her the baby
love taking on the form of flesh
our passion now personified
blissfully knocked out in some naughty little girl world
in her dreams scarlet wades through nutella marshes
with her dora backpack full of the littlest pets
the night was milky grey
a warmish breeze barely made the blinds move
in my dream julian the magician appeared
there he was quite matter o fact
its all happening , isnt it he said
he was hyper real
he was superimposed on the other thing
like a sports commentator might appear on top of the footy
julian hung around for a while
i could see the weave of his rust coloured jumper
i could see him eating wattle seed yoghurt
n having a cheeky laugh
its all happening, isnt it he said again
i said to him
are you somewhere travelling down the vine
are you floating in some dmt sky?
maybe i am he said
whys it all happening? i ask him
julian likes people to do their own thinking though
he doesnt trot out some old stupid answer
he looks at me
he says
i know you
i know who you are
am i ready? i ask
he laughs a little cruelly at this
no he says
my questions start bubbling out
why not? when will i? how should it?
hes looking at me again
slightly shaking his head
why ask me? he telepaths at me
all the answers are with you
in you
in everyone
julian grins and pisses off
to whatever strange plane he was hanging out in
the energy grid was still connecting me n my wife
its true i said to myself
isnt it?
what? said my stupid "left" brain
the answer?
no said mcsage
the buddha of eastern suburbia
there are no answers
there are no questions
there just is
there is an "is"
and it just "is"
oh said left lobe
and they both went back to sleep
ps
both wife and i
very recharged this morning
mmmm yes
thank you to all concerned!
Thursday, April 10, 2008
we will fall
another day comes and fades into history
hit history kill
we dont want people to revisit it again
timetravellers arriving in 08
aliens among us
the old nepalese lady next door is maybe kali
lights incense to the elephant headed god
old jumbo himself
lord ganesha
god of thresholds
god of overcoming barriers
son of shiva
brahma vishnu shiva
the trinity
father son holy spirit
vishnu reincarnates as rama
then as krishna
then as buddha
god comes into the world to experience himself
isnt that all of us?
i ask why must i experience this pain and longing?
i ask why i must experience this agonizing separation?
i must have needed it
i must have needed to go through the humiliation of addiction
i must have needed to gain and lose
i must have needed to sing and play
my eternal soul needed to enact these things
my friend in hospital...why god why?
but frank says
we will all learn by his example
this is his gift
though the price is a terrible one for him....
everything i take for granted
even having a pee
or blowing my nose
is now denied him
hes just lying there waiting to pass away
but i see him
and i learn
the fragility of life
the omni-presence of death
the courage of humanity
the sacrifice of heroes
i learn
you can live your life like a man
take it on the chin
cop it sweet my fiendss
cop it sweet
life will break all our hearts before we go
this is not permanent
you may lose your teeth and hair and good looks
you may lose your friends n parents n (god forbid) children
you will be blamed for what ya never did
others may take the credit for your hard labours
you will be spurned when you most needed love
you will be swamped when you most needed solitude
good things will turn ugly
ugly things will become hideous
you will inevitably become olde
and the world will rush on by you
and you may feel used up and useless
others will surpass you
always someone richer younger smarter luckier
but always someone more down n out
comparisons have always fucked me up
youre jealous of some geezer
who suddenly croaks in a bad way
what do you do with yer jealousy then?
did you learn?
didja find another bloke who seems to be living it large
and envy him instead?
theres a reason that youre you
i never wanted to be me
anyone but me
someone with a better name
someone with no freckles and stronger arms
someone who sells a billion records and got no worries
at first someone older
then someone younger
someone american
someone indian
someone living in ancient greece
someone with a big house in vaucluse
someone here or there
someone with a yacht
someone who flies business class
someone somewhere warm n cosy
in with the in crowd
someone like picasso
someone like that guy over there
he looks like hes got it all together..
of course i look at all the others
the ones i dont want to be
oh im glad im not as old or sick or washed up as so n so
oh im glad im not an annoying fucking idiot like robbie willy-i-ams
oh im glad im not as stupid or damned like georgie bush
oh im glad im not in that plane crash or earthquake or war
glad im not a fundamentalist or christian ratbag
glad im not a soldier or a sanitation engineer
glad im not a doctor or nurse
glad i keep my hands clean and my conscience fooled
life is happening on a billion levels at least
there is no one answer
if anyone says
ITS LIKE THIS!
say
bullshit
especially if its some prick of a door to door
mormon or witness
some fresh scrubbed ninny
brandishing a bible
he aint even begun to grokk on its many levels
telling you youre immortal soul is doomed
if you dont immediately drop everything
and believe in his brand of hokum
if youre a christian you believe in love n compassion
end of story
thats christs message
not fucking armageddon
not youre in n youre out
trust me kids
it aint gonna be like that
i been around
i been watching
i seen the beggars n the cripples
i seen the hopeless n helpless
i seen the hippo-crits n pharisees too
i seen villains get rich n happy
i seen heroes dying almost alone
i seen money and rich guys
i seen junkies with nothing at all
nothing left except what theyre wearing
i seen healers and magic
i seen miracles and atrocities
i seen an idiot fix an election n no one could stop it
i seen slob-o-dan milosy-vitch
and general rat-ko and dr evil whatsis-vitch
i seen my kids being born
i seen mobs elevating people
i seen mobs turning nasty
i seen unexpected help and love from enemies
i seen friends turn their back
i found out people i thought i hated i really loved
and vice versa
i seen breast implants
i seen plastic surgery
i seen western imperialism
i seen the meat n arms industries
i seen drunk driving and its result
i seen trump and his ilk sell of the earth
i seen monarchies
i seen what we done to the animals n the natives
but still
i hate it when my records get bad reviews
i hate it when i get a parking ticket
i hate it when the publishers fuck me over
blather on olde time being
what you trying to say, boy?
i dunno
maybe this
watch out!
appearances are deceptive
beware of maya
beware of complacency
kiss yer friends
give yer enemies a fucking break
try harder in whatever you do
transcendence is to be found in that extra inch of effort
you maybe surprised at how much you can do
avoid eating dead things..its only obvious isnt it?
confront your darkness
it hates the light
be compassionate
be friendly
be understanding
exactly the way
you hope people will be to you
if its over its over
let it all go
breathe out and let it all go
exhale and set your miseries free
rejoice that you aint in jail or in a hospice waiting to die
be someone you can be proud of when its all over
you can change
look at me
lifes a dream
dream up dreamers
enjoy it while you can
it all could stop at anytime
bang!
just like that!
make the most of it
love
sk
hit history kill
we dont want people to revisit it again
timetravellers arriving in 08
aliens among us
the old nepalese lady next door is maybe kali
lights incense to the elephant headed god
old jumbo himself
lord ganesha
god of thresholds
god of overcoming barriers
son of shiva
brahma vishnu shiva
the trinity
father son holy spirit
vishnu reincarnates as rama
then as krishna
then as buddha
god comes into the world to experience himself
isnt that all of us?
i ask why must i experience this pain and longing?
i ask why i must experience this agonizing separation?
i must have needed it
i must have needed to go through the humiliation of addiction
i must have needed to gain and lose
i must have needed to sing and play
my eternal soul needed to enact these things
my friend in hospital...why god why?
but frank says
we will all learn by his example
this is his gift
though the price is a terrible one for him....
everything i take for granted
even having a pee
or blowing my nose
is now denied him
hes just lying there waiting to pass away
but i see him
and i learn
the fragility of life
the omni-presence of death
the courage of humanity
the sacrifice of heroes
i learn
you can live your life like a man
take it on the chin
cop it sweet my fiendss
cop it sweet
life will break all our hearts before we go
this is not permanent
you may lose your teeth and hair and good looks
you may lose your friends n parents n (god forbid) children
you will be blamed for what ya never did
others may take the credit for your hard labours
you will be spurned when you most needed love
you will be swamped when you most needed solitude
good things will turn ugly
ugly things will become hideous
you will inevitably become olde
and the world will rush on by you
and you may feel used up and useless
others will surpass you
always someone richer younger smarter luckier
but always someone more down n out
comparisons have always fucked me up
youre jealous of some geezer
who suddenly croaks in a bad way
what do you do with yer jealousy then?
did you learn?
didja find another bloke who seems to be living it large
and envy him instead?
theres a reason that youre you
i never wanted to be me
anyone but me
someone with a better name
someone with no freckles and stronger arms
someone who sells a billion records and got no worries
at first someone older
then someone younger
someone american
someone indian
someone living in ancient greece
someone with a big house in vaucluse
someone here or there
someone with a yacht
someone who flies business class
someone somewhere warm n cosy
in with the in crowd
someone like picasso
someone like that guy over there
he looks like hes got it all together..
of course i look at all the others
the ones i dont want to be
oh im glad im not as old or sick or washed up as so n so
oh im glad im not an annoying fucking idiot like robbie willy-i-ams
oh im glad im not as stupid or damned like georgie bush
oh im glad im not in that plane crash or earthquake or war
glad im not a fundamentalist or christian ratbag
glad im not a soldier or a sanitation engineer
glad im not a doctor or nurse
glad i keep my hands clean and my conscience fooled
life is happening on a billion levels at least
there is no one answer
if anyone says
ITS LIKE THIS!
say
bullshit
especially if its some prick of a door to door
mormon or witness
some fresh scrubbed ninny
brandishing a bible
he aint even begun to grokk on its many levels
telling you youre immortal soul is doomed
if you dont immediately drop everything
and believe in his brand of hokum
if youre a christian you believe in love n compassion
end of story
thats christs message
not fucking armageddon
not youre in n youre out
trust me kids
it aint gonna be like that
i been around
i been watching
i seen the beggars n the cripples
i seen the hopeless n helpless
i seen the hippo-crits n pharisees too
i seen villains get rich n happy
i seen heroes dying almost alone
i seen money and rich guys
i seen junkies with nothing at all
nothing left except what theyre wearing
i seen healers and magic
i seen miracles and atrocities
i seen an idiot fix an election n no one could stop it
i seen slob-o-dan milosy-vitch
and general rat-ko and dr evil whatsis-vitch
i seen my kids being born
i seen mobs elevating people
i seen mobs turning nasty
i seen unexpected help and love from enemies
i seen friends turn their back
i found out people i thought i hated i really loved
and vice versa
i seen breast implants
i seen plastic surgery
i seen western imperialism
i seen the meat n arms industries
i seen drunk driving and its result
i seen trump and his ilk sell of the earth
i seen monarchies
i seen what we done to the animals n the natives
but still
i hate it when my records get bad reviews
i hate it when i get a parking ticket
i hate it when the publishers fuck me over
blather on olde time being
what you trying to say, boy?
i dunno
maybe this
watch out!
appearances are deceptive
beware of maya
beware of complacency
kiss yer friends
give yer enemies a fucking break
try harder in whatever you do
transcendence is to be found in that extra inch of effort
you maybe surprised at how much you can do
avoid eating dead things..its only obvious isnt it?
confront your darkness
it hates the light
be compassionate
be friendly
be understanding
exactly the way
you hope people will be to you
if its over its over
let it all go
breathe out and let it all go
exhale and set your miseries free
rejoice that you aint in jail or in a hospice waiting to die
be someone you can be proud of when its all over
you can change
look at me
lifes a dream
dream up dreamers
enjoy it while you can
it all could stop at anytime
bang!
just like that!
make the most of it
love
sk
Wednesday, April 09, 2008
my crow wave
things have changed
things remain the same
my friend in hospital slowly going under
we visit him n cry n cry
i play him some songs on my 12
afterwards an old sick geezer in the next room
sees me standing in the corridor tryin' to stop my bawling
a real old aussie geezer on deaths doorstep
hey he says
was that you playin' n singin'...?
yeah i say
there ya go he says to his daughter helping him along
she said it was the radio but i said no no
thats comin' straight outta here..
he indicates his heart
that music was byootiful he said
and he shuffled off
his praise meant more than a wilderness of rock festivals
then a doctor an old serious doc comes up
hes frowning a little
im half expecting a
"please respect the patients quiet times!"
but no
thanks for the music he says
and a gentle sad smile
god he has seen so much suffering
well if you need to get things in perspective....
and i do
always
i gotta keep reminding myself we are on a round rock
orbitting a big fire
and no one really knows how or why
here in my spare room
on a rainy morning every thing seems so permanent
aurora gets up
a big sleepy kiss and a grin
my doodles with the delightful habit of kissing their daddy much
oh youre lovely kids i say
i bury my nose in their hair and breathe in their warm young aroma
i hold them in my arms..
goddamm it all seems solid enough....!
ah yesterday was hard going
nelg the camera elf was round to film some more of gets toned and pain(t)
but instead of my usual ebullient motor mouth self
there i sit holding an eraser staring dumbly at a commission portrait
doing n saying nothing
i struggle on for twenny minutes
but finally i tell nelg to wrap it up for the day
hey maybe its good to see me have a bad day i say
yeah...says nelg somewhat doubtfully
im listening to bits of new church album
some sad
some rockin'
some very pretty
some quite oblique
some absolute genius
some mistakes to fix up
"we'll fix that" says my voice after some blue notes somewhere
it makes me smile to hear it
i say those same words in my mind in synch with recorded voice
always at the same time
so....
in front of you :
1 the wild sweet hit of painkiller
space rock pomp rock psychy-fuckin'-delic rock
they may wanna ban this record in malaysia
such is the contact high oozing out of its grooves
you like wolfe live?
wait till you hear it with drums n orch
you like delicate achey ballads...try crystalline rush
you like e-like feeling... try look homeward angel
you like pounding drums and radiotronics...its all over it
some of you will like painkiller more than anything you ever heard
2kilbey n kennedy presents....something as yet untitled
you know it
this is the beautiful stuff
the simple stuff
the universal stuff
the blips and talking trumpets...
the space around the notes....
the easy on the ears stuff
the melodic stuff
the real real songs stuff
the poignant stuff
the subtle n sexy stuff
the romantic stuff
this one you will play over n over
you'll never get sick of it
3 shriek soundtrack
ooh strange stuff dark stuff
fevered music
whispery scrawly medieval bluesy
half songs
evil basslines
snakey guitars
tribesmen chanting
opera singers and mellotrons
too much in some places
a total aural trip
dig it or
you suck!
(just jokin')
4. coffee hounds ep
wow
a cool thing it is
the coffee song submarine n floydy
hounds o love fast n furious
instrumental ....very stoned
5 the church album
hmmm
marty said its strange in a good way
so i'll leave it at that
well its a rainy day n a bit cold
i got my synthetic ugg boots on
a nice day to be in the sauna anyway
and swimming in the rain too...
bye
things remain the same
my friend in hospital slowly going under
we visit him n cry n cry
i play him some songs on my 12
afterwards an old sick geezer in the next room
sees me standing in the corridor tryin' to stop my bawling
a real old aussie geezer on deaths doorstep
hey he says
was that you playin' n singin'...?
yeah i say
there ya go he says to his daughter helping him along
she said it was the radio but i said no no
thats comin' straight outta here..
he indicates his heart
that music was byootiful he said
and he shuffled off
his praise meant more than a wilderness of rock festivals
then a doctor an old serious doc comes up
hes frowning a little
im half expecting a
"please respect the patients quiet times!"
but no
thanks for the music he says
and a gentle sad smile
god he has seen so much suffering
well if you need to get things in perspective....
and i do
always
i gotta keep reminding myself we are on a round rock
orbitting a big fire
and no one really knows how or why
here in my spare room
on a rainy morning every thing seems so permanent
aurora gets up
a big sleepy kiss and a grin
my doodles with the delightful habit of kissing their daddy much
oh youre lovely kids i say
i bury my nose in their hair and breathe in their warm young aroma
i hold them in my arms..
goddamm it all seems solid enough....!
ah yesterday was hard going
nelg the camera elf was round to film some more of gets toned and pain(t)
but instead of my usual ebullient motor mouth self
there i sit holding an eraser staring dumbly at a commission portrait
doing n saying nothing
i struggle on for twenny minutes
but finally i tell nelg to wrap it up for the day
hey maybe its good to see me have a bad day i say
yeah...says nelg somewhat doubtfully
im listening to bits of new church album
some sad
some rockin'
some very pretty
some quite oblique
some absolute genius
some mistakes to fix up
"we'll fix that" says my voice after some blue notes somewhere
it makes me smile to hear it
i say those same words in my mind in synch with recorded voice
always at the same time
so....
in front of you :
1 the wild sweet hit of painkiller
space rock pomp rock psychy-fuckin'-delic rock
they may wanna ban this record in malaysia
such is the contact high oozing out of its grooves
you like wolfe live?
wait till you hear it with drums n orch
you like delicate achey ballads...try crystalline rush
you like e-like feeling... try look homeward angel
you like pounding drums and radiotronics...its all over it
some of you will like painkiller more than anything you ever heard
2kilbey n kennedy presents....something as yet untitled
you know it
this is the beautiful stuff
the simple stuff
the universal stuff
the blips and talking trumpets...
the space around the notes....
the easy on the ears stuff
the melodic stuff
the real real songs stuff
the poignant stuff
the subtle n sexy stuff
the romantic stuff
this one you will play over n over
you'll never get sick of it
3 shriek soundtrack
ooh strange stuff dark stuff
fevered music
whispery scrawly medieval bluesy
half songs
evil basslines
snakey guitars
tribesmen chanting
opera singers and mellotrons
too much in some places
a total aural trip
dig it or
you suck!
(just jokin')
4. coffee hounds ep
wow
a cool thing it is
the coffee song submarine n floydy
hounds o love fast n furious
instrumental ....very stoned
5 the church album
hmmm
marty said its strange in a good way
so i'll leave it at that
well its a rainy day n a bit cold
i got my synthetic ugg boots on
a nice day to be in the sauna anyway
and swimming in the rain too...
bye
Tuesday, April 08, 2008
sleep
oh sleep dont leave me again
oh sleep i cant make it without you
oh sleep i appreciate you now
oh sleep you are everything
down to the smallest detail
within the minute glades of the tiniest worlds
at the core of everything
traversing blackspace radiosonic hypertronic
the call of sleep
sleep you handsome man
sleep you beautiful lady
sleep you children
creamy dreamy sleep
sleep so luxurious as you take me down
sleep a divine condition
swallows my sorrows
window to my pane
sleep you whitedevil sleep
drown in rumbling slumber waves of sleep
tossed and turned on sleeps restless motion
breathe deep and sleep
sleepy music
warm blue sleep
sleep of the just
sleep of the just after
sleep off the drink
sleep well my dear
sleep is a person to me
sleep appears dressed in a yawnsuit
sleep is a boy with blond hair
sleep asleep himself in my old room
sleep keeps to himself
sleeps dormitory in hushed tones
sleep babylon and nineveh
sleep little egypt
people in lemuria getting sleepy
the mayans persisting through the jungle
crystal skulls are asleep
the dormant night
the creeping shadow of evening
the wedding bed
the softest sheets
youre becoming drowsier
youre feeling heavier
the thoughts all fall to the back of your head
sleep baby bunny sleep tiny star
sleep scarlet girl with your ringlets of gold
sleep like a stone
sleep like state
sleep in and under
sleep
during and because of
sleep
better than ever
sleep
to have and to hold in sleep
catching up on some
a sleep in a stream
a sleep at the wheelbarrow
a sleep and alert
sleep together:dream alone
your becoming sleep
youre becoming wrapped in sleep
drowsier and drowsier
and you are so becoming
sleep-happy sleep-drunk
sleep-addicted
sleep-cure
sleep-time
sleep-substitute
sleep-heart
sleep-industry
no sleep
no life
getting hard to fight sleep
sleep get behind me
sweet sleep oh sweet sleep
sleep lay down here
and
stay awhile
oh sleep i cant make it without you
oh sleep i appreciate you now
oh sleep you are everything
down to the smallest detail
within the minute glades of the tiniest worlds
at the core of everything
traversing blackspace radiosonic hypertronic
the call of sleep
sleep you handsome man
sleep you beautiful lady
sleep you children
creamy dreamy sleep
sleep so luxurious as you take me down
sleep a divine condition
swallows my sorrows
window to my pane
sleep you whitedevil sleep
drown in rumbling slumber waves of sleep
tossed and turned on sleeps restless motion
breathe deep and sleep
sleepy music
warm blue sleep
sleep of the just
sleep of the just after
sleep off the drink
sleep well my dear
sleep is a person to me
sleep appears dressed in a yawnsuit
sleep is a boy with blond hair
sleep asleep himself in my old room
sleep keeps to himself
sleeps dormitory in hushed tones
sleep babylon and nineveh
sleep little egypt
people in lemuria getting sleepy
the mayans persisting through the jungle
crystal skulls are asleep
the dormant night
the creeping shadow of evening
the wedding bed
the softest sheets
youre becoming drowsier
youre feeling heavier
the thoughts all fall to the back of your head
sleep baby bunny sleep tiny star
sleep scarlet girl with your ringlets of gold
sleep like a stone
sleep like state
sleep in and under
sleep
during and because of
sleep
better than ever
sleep
to have and to hold in sleep
catching up on some
a sleep in a stream
a sleep at the wheelbarrow
a sleep and alert
sleep together:dream alone
your becoming sleep
youre becoming wrapped in sleep
drowsier and drowsier
and you are so becoming
sleep-happy sleep-drunk
sleep-addicted
sleep-cure
sleep-time
sleep-substitute
sleep-heart
sleep-industry
no sleep
no life
getting hard to fight sleep
sleep get behind me
sweet sleep oh sweet sleep
sleep lay down here
and
stay awhile
Monday, April 07, 2008
at an internet kiosk melbourne airport
melbourne was good
not transcendent maybe
but good
martin kennedy played 6 songs
it was like the record live basically
it worked yes it worked
lovely songs lotsa space
we can/could do the whole album like this anywhere
travis came up and sang and played
travis from all those yearsago in perth
now got his own album out
called him unexpectedly to the stage
he rose to the challenge and almost stole the show
then michael the drummer from tarmac adam
who i just met
who played one song with me at s/check
he slotted in so perfectly
i instantly became addicted to all his percussive effects
and he had a load of em ...bells n jinglies n glocks
man he was just right
so 3 heroes in my eyes
these 3 geezers
me myself i was ok
not as mouthy as sydney i guess
it was a special night
i guess we had about a hundred people
polinski mixed it
i trust he was doing some nice things
we sold some dvds
the good old melby gang were there
no complaints
what a nice way to earn yer living
obviously me n mr kennedy should do our whole album
live
when it comes out
and i'd like to play with michael again
it was good
im content
not transcendent maybe
but good
martin kennedy played 6 songs
it was like the record live basically
it worked yes it worked
lovely songs lotsa space
we can/could do the whole album like this anywhere
travis came up and sang and played
travis from all those yearsago in perth
now got his own album out
called him unexpectedly to the stage
he rose to the challenge and almost stole the show
then michael the drummer from tarmac adam
who i just met
who played one song with me at s/check
he slotted in so perfectly
i instantly became addicted to all his percussive effects
and he had a load of em ...bells n jinglies n glocks
man he was just right
so 3 heroes in my eyes
these 3 geezers
me myself i was ok
not as mouthy as sydney i guess
it was a special night
i guess we had about a hundred people
polinski mixed it
i trust he was doing some nice things
we sold some dvds
the good old melby gang were there
no complaints
what a nice way to earn yer living
obviously me n mr kennedy should do our whole album
live
when it comes out
and i'd like to play with michael again
it was good
im content
Sunday, April 06, 2008
doubt
pessimystic cloak round my shoulders
dark days drugged stupor
sleep through meeting
ears ring on in an envelope of limitation
everything makes me angry
nothing gets done im just mucking around
fear fear fear
premonitions threaten out of earshot eyeshot
alienhand
car chugs down rainy lanes
people argue in the driveways
hopeless look in your eyes
becalmed in 2008
the earth and everything on it seems doomed
insects multiply everywhere
the stars shift
the moon comes closer
evil omen : black cat catches white dove
gifts are lost
wounds remembered
age of squabbles
age of small print disclaimers
time is revealed as a mirage
there never was any time
or time beings
time is gone
time is up
time is not on time
go ask alice
go ask kafka
go ask your mother
time
cant get around it or under it
it aint there
you cant stop it
hang on to it
appreciate it
whatever
it dont matter
time is not matter
in the time it takes
to read this blog
something significant probably happened
somewhere.....
dark days drugged stupor
sleep through meeting
ears ring on in an envelope of limitation
everything makes me angry
nothing gets done im just mucking around
fear fear fear
premonitions threaten out of earshot eyeshot
alienhand
car chugs down rainy lanes
people argue in the driveways
hopeless look in your eyes
becalmed in 2008
the earth and everything on it seems doomed
insects multiply everywhere
the stars shift
the moon comes closer
evil omen : black cat catches white dove
gifts are lost
wounds remembered
age of squabbles
age of small print disclaimers
time is revealed as a mirage
there never was any time
or time beings
time is gone
time is up
time is not on time
go ask alice
go ask kafka
go ask your mother
time
cant get around it or under it
it aint there
you cant stop it
hang on to it
appreciate it
whatever
it dont matter
time is not matter
in the time it takes
to read this blog
something significant probably happened
somewhere.....
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