and im bustin' up mah brains for the words
set the scene nevets
3 52 tuesday aftahnooon
hang on yabbers wall like a good god should
im only 29 in the chartes now
i dont care
(panic...feeling of sliding into ooze of obscurity)
what do i nevets yeblik care for yonder blogge charte
yonder index of prestige n mettle
a gauge of popularity
a way of seeing whos who
i'll lock my self away in an eastern suburbs monastery
and type my loverly blogs for me me! ME!
and only ii! I! will get to read em
an i donna care if some goose is gonna cook
under the milky whey tonite on the telly
so donna tella me bout it now
(but you can be sure crafty ol' nevets is watchin')
television oh television
my face should be plastered all over every screen
my soft dulcid melodious voice should pump from every speaker
my blogge and only my blogge should be at # 1
bah puny earthlings
how could you understand my destiny
IS TO BE # 1 ON THE BLOGGECHARTES !!
i will never rest
i will always be plotting
is it gonna take an eroticon de blogge to make the one
more rants n raves n all yer faves
georgie dubble ya money back to the wall
and i ran iran so far away.....
aurora bore all of us we say to our little a.
eve...why dontcha leave...thats our little joke round here too
the water so cold today fiendss
so cold at the edge of time
saw jonny z bassist extraordinaire at pool
plus brother john n matty c
(both lookin' fit n trim i must add)
only did 18 laps but i lied to myself
and i lied to everybody else
getting real hooked on oophoi
gettting real hooked on catherines weal too
a millioin times better for this olde space rocker
than the ye olde radiumheads
but thats jus my private opinion
between you me an the other 1100 jokers on here each day
christ i need somethin' controversial to hitch mah ratings up
i feel like the ratings are my trousers n theyre slowly falling down
(control thyselves, thouest fair maidens, the metafor is in jest)
i wanna pull my ratings UP
do you know how humiliated it is sliding down a fucking chart
with a bare arse?
or even a bare ass?
or even a bear donkey...ha ha nevets..thats pathetic
indulge my ego
its outta control now
its in charge and it wants one
it wants 1!
give me one
oh my muse i am besotted with the position one
sadly unattainable nevetsy my deer deer bouy
but why muse why
(lawd, ain' it the troof!!!)
do you really mean it muse?
yes darling nevets
after all whose muse am i anyway?
oh yer mine
you aint been round rob dickos have ya?
(sound of a disconnected phone line.....fade)